Home   |  Issues  |  The Daily Star Home | Volume 5, Issue 9, Tuesday, March 1, 2009


wear your womanhood proudly ladies

How does one define beauty? What is beauty? Is it indeed skin deep? ....or is there more? Anything that's pleasing to the eye and makes you want to behold it again and again can be called beautiful. There are mathematical measurements of a perfect face in existence, distance between the eyes, the length of the nose, width of the lips etc, etc. The resultant computer generated image was indeed beautiful but unreal and as far as the male opinion was concerned most men felt that the x factor was missing. In my opinion the image was plastic, with no soul. What makes a person real is her personality, her attitude to life and those around her; her sense of style and her carriage, not to mention what she has to say and how she says it. Her self-confidence and belief in herself and to hold her own makes her the person she is. The world sees a man or woman in totality, personality, grooming, sense of humour, ability to hold an interesting conversation, sense of style and dress and sure, looks too.

A beautiful woman walks into the room and wow!!! All eyes on her, lots of admiring and maybe envious glances are cast her way, compliments galore. Things settle down and the beauty has no idea that there has been an earthquake in Haiti and thousands have perished or that Osama and Obama are not the same person....yes its true ! I was watching a programme on TV the other day where the contestant was asked Obama's full name and lo and behold! She said Bin Laden !!! It would kill the deal for most.....needless to say it did for her too. There has to be more than looks folks.

Not everybody is born to look like Aishwariya and believe me even she can't have her looks for ever, so at the end of the day what are we left with .....our personality , grace and grooming. What you are as a person stays with you forever. Charm is ageless and intelligence priceless. Add to that a groomed persona, well done hair, clean manicured nails and you can be the belle of the ball at 60 too.

If you are not blessed with Elizabeth Taylor's beauty - and most of us unfortunately aren't - don't fall apart over it. Take charge and work on the things that you can change for the better.

Start by working on your self-confidence, its the foundation for a better, new you. Learn to love yourself just the way you are without being affected by what people have to say.

I've often noticed that most people wait for other people to tell them that they are looking good or bad, only then do they truly feel happy. Heaven forbid the feedback is not positive, they are miserable. For God's sake, what about your own opinion? Look in the mirror and decide for yourselves, how can you not see whether something is suiting you or not.

Try and make yourself a more interesting person, keep in touch with current events both local and global. No, I'm not asking you to do a PhD, just watch the news everyday. An update on current events will make you aware of what is going on around you. Topics of discussion are usually related to these; open yourself to the real world and form your own opinions about events and situations. There are no right or wrong answers here....they are simply 'your' opinions. Speak your mind and share your thoughts and feelings, not everybody has to agree or disagree with you, but stand by your convictions and beliefs.

You could be the most alluring lady in Dhaka but if you are intellectually challenged people will eventually get bored. After all how long and how many times can you admire the same beautiful statue?

There are umpteen examples of attractive personalities in our society and we have seen how people flock to them because they are charming or intelligent and interesting. Nobody is perfect but everyone has something that is positive in their personality, hone in on it and nurture it .

There can be no substitute for kindness of heart, a compassionate nature and loving attitude. These are attributes that can change the world and make a difference; whether you are beautiful or not means nothing if you have these in possession. Qualities such as these are what really matter in life . The colour of your skin, dusky or not plays no role in the long run.

Love yourselves confidently and others will love you for what you are as well.

I once was doing makeup for a girl with a dusky complexion, she had the most amazing features, stunning cheekbones, arched brows, full lips ....name it, she had it! She was stunned that I complimented her so effusively because she was convinced that she was ordinary and dark, therefore not beautiful. That's when I realised that people are so prejudiced about skin colour here ....shame on you Dhaka ....if this girl was walking the streets of any continent except ours modelling agencies would be chasing her.

The Western world is baking themselves in the sun, risking skin cancer to get browner and look at us making our daughters feel worthless because they may not be fair.

Easier said than done but maybe some people may see things differently if made aware.

Wear your womanhood proudly ladies, make the most of what life has offered you and don't hesitate to improve what you can. Identify what really is important to you and give that priority. What matters in life is the person you are, the relationships you create, the responsibilities you live up to as a wife, mother, daughter and sister.

Photo: Star Lifestyle Archives


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