I just graduated last year and my problem is my mother.
I'm not the ideal child to her. She always scolds me and
tells me what to do and never lets me do what I want. She
is very conservative and does not allow me to go out alone
with my friends. I don't know whether I'm right or wrong.
I tried talking to her but she says I'm wrong. I'm losing
confidence in my interactions with others. A few years ago
I even tried to do whatever she asked me to but it still
wasn't appreciated so, frustrated, I gave up. I don't know
what to do. I don't want to hurt her, but I can't go on
like this. I tried talking to my friends and relatives about
this but no one has been able to help and it's getting worse
day by day. She gets angry with me for the most trivial
things. I'm very confused and lost and bored of life. I'm
rather soft at heart and don't like going against my elders.
But I'm beginning to have a love-hate relationship with
my mother -- loving her but at the same time storing up
all this anger and frustration within me which I'm afraid
may just one day burst out.
Child (I do not want to call you “bad child”)
communications between you and your mother has deteriorated
to the extent that you both are not listening to each other.
You will have to try and establish some kind of communications
which might not be the best but at least some way to talk
to each other. You could also try to talk to her when she
is in a better mood after all she cannot be angry all the
time. Perhaps she is going through a bad time, it might
be a good idea to find out what she wants, her wishes and
needs. Often we take the role of our mothers as granted
tend to forget that they have their own frustrations. Often
in their effort to do the best for the family they become
over protective and lose the support of the family. I do
not think your case is hopeless, please try to be patient
and work towards restablishing communications with your
I'm a 22-year-old student of IBA, DU. When I was in Class
10, I fell in love with a girl from my batch. I spoke to
her only once and was very nervous and felt almost sick.
I met her a few times after that but she never spoke to
me again and I haven't been in touch with her since then.
I know love can't be one-sided, but I can't stop loving
her and can't bear the thought of her being someone else's.
I feel like I will love her until doomsday. I feel extremely
helpless and dejected. Please help.
You seem to be in love with an idea than the real person.
She is not real nor is she the same person you met when
you were in class 10. People change especially at this growing
age from class nine to university. You have also changed
but perhaps you want to cling on to a feeling you had many
years ago. If you met her now you will be surprised to find
a very different person. In fact you might not be interested
in her anymore. On the other hand, she does not even know
of your feelings leave alone be interested in you. I hate
to disappoint you but this is really hopeless. Please get
a grip of yourself and face the real world.
I'm in love with a guy who also loves me very much. Could
you please tell me the legal way to get married?
The legal way to get married is first to make sure that
you are of the right and legal age to get married. It is
18 for women and 21 for men. It is always better to take
consent of your parents and guardians. If they refuse to
give consent then it is legal to go to the marriage registrar
with a witness and get married.
I would like to add that just because you both think you
are in love is not enough. Please give this careful thought
before you get married because marriage is serious business.
Once you do it you cannot just wish it away.