<%-- Page Title--%> Write to Mita <%-- End Page Title--%>

<%-- Volume Number --%> Vol 1 Num 117 <%-- End Volume Number --%>

August 08, 2003

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Dear Mita,
I was a May 2003 O' Level examinee. I faced a lot of problems with my GCE Computing syllabus. I couldn't finish it and decided not to appear for the exam. But my father was not ready to accept this. I dropped the subject and he was very angry with me, blaming me for wasting so much money on it and then not sitting for the exam. I couldn't complete the syllabus as I was unable to attend a lot of classes due to some physical problems. Was I really wrong in dropping the subject after registering for the exam and a week before the actual exam?

Dear S,
Your father's anger is quite understandable. He is frustrated that you gave up so easily. I am also of the opinion that you should not have dropped it. Perhaps you would not have done well but at least you could have gained experience from it and done better next time. Anyway, this is done, but next time, remember it is easy to give up and one can do that anytime. It is far more satisfying to confront a challenge and then overcome it.

Dear Mita,
I'm a 20-year-old student of DU. It has been my long-cherished desire to study at IBA, DU. I sat for the admission test in 2001 and did well in the written test and was selected for the interview but not for the final admission. I began preparing for the admission test for the following year while having gotten myself admitted into the Accounting Department, DU. But the same thing happened in 2002 and I was very humiliated. Though I got to the interview and even did well, I did not get admission into IBA. I believe that I am qualified to study at IBA and that I was discriminated against for having done my HSC from the commerce group as I have heard that IBA does not want to take commerce students. How can I get rid of my frustration? I can't take it anymore and want to lead a normal life.
-- M

Dear M,
This is really not the end of the world. Examinations are as much a matter of luck as they are of talent. Perhaps luck did not favour you the last two times. There is no reason to feel humiliated or even frustrated. You must carry on with your present course of studies. MBA can be done at a later stage, even after you have started your career. What is most important is to excel in whatever you are doing. Becoming frustrated at this stage will not help you attain your goal. I am sure you will be rewarded in the long run.

Dear Mita,
I'm in my 4th semester at Daffodil. Two weeks ago, I met a family whose son I was supposed to marry. There were two men in white shirts and when I was told that I was supposed to marry one of them, I mistook the man I was to marry and fell in love at first sight with the other one and gave my consent to the marriage. It was only on the day of the engagement that the guy I liked came to my house with gifts and called me “Bhabi”. His brother, who I didn't even consider as my prospective groom as he looked old enough to be my uncle, is the one I'm supposed to marry. All the arrangements have been made and even the invitations printed. I know looks shouldn't be the first consideration but I'm totally in love with the brother of my husband-to-be. I can't even tell anyone about it as it's so embarrassing and as I brought this upon myself. Please tell me how I can break off this marriage!

Dear SK,
I must say that your story sounds more out of a movie than real. There are many stages before the engagement is announced and it is very strange that you did not discover your mistake earlier. Moreover, I cannot understand how you can agree to marriage without talking to the person. Regarding your falling in love with the brother. This is again an infatuation as you have seen him once. A commitment to marriage goes beyond looks and love at first sight works only for a short while. However, if this has happened and is totally unacceptable to you then you must tell your parents that they do not have your consent. I am sure they will not force you to marry anyone against your wishes.


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