Freedom of the
Barisal there is an old tale doing the rounds. One local saying
to another, 'Baidu, in life I have had many keel (punch) and
goota (jab), but porkeeto-pakkhe (in reality) I have never been
launch accidents and subsequent apathy of the authorities, launch
strikes and the strange haughty mind-set of launch owners, abducted
Chittagong businessman remaining untraced for weeks despite
joint drives, concurrent killing of another abducted businessman
in the same city, turmoil in the courts across the country,
fake 500 Taka notes unearthed in the vault of the Bangladesh
Bank the very protectors of our currency, beating up of journalists,
spiralling price rise of essentials, leaking of BCS question
papers twice within the year, discovery of murdered children
in a dustbin, unabated crime... but in reality a bibek-bihin
nation is never insulted.
like this the ever-reliable fourth estate cannot sit idle. Moreover,
it also means a lot of money to people who already have a lot
of money. Funny, but that's how money rolls. In fact money could
easily have been called 'funny', except that under the familiarity
of their respective use, the switching may also sound money,
you loan me some funny?'
Kut-kut: 'You know I am totally broke. So why do you make mon
circumstances, several new newspapers may soon hit the stand.
newspersons unable to consider anything but murder, abduction,
kidnapping, hijacking, rape, fake notes, price rise, strikes,
break-in and robbery as being newsworthy, entrepreneurs are
pondering on cashing in on the state of affairs. And call a
spade a spade.
to go for such a venture is perhaps induced by French historian
Voltaire (1694-1778), who had said, 'It is dangerous to be right
when the government is wrong'.
can hardly blame only the powers that be if you lend a ear to
the American comic actor Groucho Marx (1895-1977), who in one
of his rare moments of seriousness said, 'Politics is the art
of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then
misapplying the wrong remedies'. I think he meant all of us
because we are a nation that thrives on 'politics'. To understand
that meaning we have to rely on an anonymous brother in Old
Dhaka, who in his frustration uttered: Kee aar komu! Maag'r,
nowadays politics has even entered our rajneeti'.
Publication houses have almost finalised the names of newspapers
that will ride on the current state of affairs and will soon
apply for registration.
such as Dainik Rahajani, Uttam Madhyam and Raktakto Bangla may
soon see the light of the day or, as the sponsors prefer, the
dark of the night. On the saucier side, a tabloid titled Chora-churi,
where daggers will be featured alongside damsels, is being contemplated
by a group interested in both. In it 'Dhaka Tonight' will highlight
attractions forthcoming after sunset. It's something like a
weather forecast in a traditional newspaper. It should be helpful
to people trying to keep away from harm's way. Who said newspapers
will not continue to benefit the common man?
language readers will not be denied their lust for grim news
either. Blood Sweat and Fears, Murder We Wrote, and Daily Subversive
are some names already booked. At least one conventional newspaper
is thinking of switching its title to 'The Daily Surrender'.
is drawing a lot of interest is the 'Daily Q&A' that not
only promises to leak questions of any and all private and public
examinations, but will have answers too. Some doctors and their
diagnostic partners are trying to prevent part of it, saying
that matters of private examinations are best left to them.
of weeklies is presently shelved because hawkers may refuse
to carry the large bulk that will be the weekly dossier on murder,
abduction, kidnapping, hijacking, rape, strikes, break-in and
will be edited by a Creditor, who will be assisted by the Executing
Editor. Unpaid advertisement bills will be a thing of the past.
Those who will not pay will pass away. There will of course
be the usual posts of Joint Creditor, Assistant Creditors and
Sub-creditors; the latter so named because they will mostly
be working from the underground.
be several seditions with a late-night sedition being specially
planned for the perpetrators of the deed, as they may want to
read something after a hard evening's work.
like everything else in Bangladesh it will not be a rosy path
all along for the pioneers of this exceptional venture. Opponents
to the idea are relying on the American version of our Khan
Ata, director, screenwriter, actor and comedian Woody Allen,
who is on record as saying, 'Capital punishment would be more
effective as a preventive measure if it were administered prior
to the crime'.