guys are captured by terrorists, one smart ,one average
and one dumb guy. The penalty would be death and they took
the three guys and said " We will execute you one at
a time", they placed the smart guy in front of a firing
smart guy thinks to him I've got to think of a disaster.
The commander orders "Ready aim."
the smart guy yells out, "Earthquake!" All of
sudden everyone scrambles.
realise it's a false alarm but the smart guy gets away,
they capture the other two, to carry out their sentence.
They place the average guy in front of the firing squad.
The average guy thinks to himself that if it works for the
smart guy, I've got think of a disaster.
The commander orders, "Ready aim" the average
guy yells out "Flood!" and everyone scrambles
he gets away.
came down to the dumb guy. They place him in front of the
firing squad. He thinks to himself, " Well it wirjed
for the smart guy; it worked for average guy.
commander orders" Ready aim " the dumb guy yells
are three engineers in a car, an electrical engineer, a
chemical engineer, and a Microsoft engineer. Suddenly the
car stops by the side of the road, and the three engineers
look at each other wondering what could be wrong.
electrical engineer suggests stripping down the electronics
of the car and trying to trace where a fault might have
occurred. The chemical engineer, not knowing much about
cars suggests that maybe the fuel is becoming emulsified
and getting blocked somewhere.
the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about anything,
comes up with a suggestion. "Why don't we close all
the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again,
and maybe it'll work!?"
Islam Habla is appearing for his University final examination.
He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the
question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration
takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He
then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His
shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit.
invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going
on. "Arre bhai, I am only following the instructions
," he says, " It says here, 'Answer the following
questions in BRIEF'."
year old man went for his annual check up and the doctor
said, "Friend, for your age you're in the best shape
I've seen." The old fellow replied, "Yep. It comes
from clean living. Why I know I live a good, clean, spiritual
life." The doctor asked, "What makes you say that?"
The old man replied, "If I didn't live a good, clean
life the Lord wouldn't turn the bathroom light on for me
every time I get up in he middle of the night."
doc was concerned. "You mean when you get up in the
night to go to the bathroom, the Lord Himself turns on the
light for you?" "Yep," the old man said,
"Whenever I get up to go to the bathroom, the Lord
turns the light on for me." Well, the doctor didn't
say anything else, but when the old man's wife came in for
her check up, he felt he had to let her know what her husband
just want you to know," the doctor said. "Your
husband is in fine physical shape but I'm worried about
his mental condition. He told me that every night when he
gets up to go to the bathroom, the Lord turns the light
on for him." "He what?" she cried. "He
said every night when he gets up to go to the bathroom,
the Lord turns the light on for him." "Aha!!!"
she exclaimed. "So he's the one who's been peeing in
the refrigerator !"
I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient: Well, might as well give me the
bad news first.
Doctor: The lab called with your test results.
They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient: 24 hours! That's terrible!! What
could be worse? What's the very bad news?
Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since