<%-- Page Title--%> Write to Mita <%-- End Page Title--%>

<%-- Volume Number --%> Vol 1 Num 137 <%-- End Volume Number --%>

January 9, 2004

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Dear Mita,
I am 24 and studying at DU. My problem is that I become passionate about anything new, that is, new games and activities, making new friends, taking new classes, etc. At first I'm always very taken up with it but after a few days I lose interest. I don't feel like doing it anymore. For example, when I'm supposed to go somewhere with my friends, I'm all excited about it and start counting down the days. But as the day draws nearer I lose all eagerness about it. Going becomes a punishment and sometimes I even refuse to go. I get bored very quickly. I can't concentrate on anything. My life is becoming miserable because of this attitude. People often think I'm moody but this isn't right. I'm worried about my future and any long-term relationships I may have. Please help me.

Dear Critique,
The fact that you have already identified the problem is a very positive step. People are usually very reluctant to admit their shortcomings and therefore solutions are difficult. You have to work on your attention span deliberately. First you must analyse why you get excited about something. Perhaps your analysis will reveal that it was not worth getting excited about in the first place. The next thing is to relax and tell your self that even if you get bored you must pursue things at least times. Finally, I do not think that this problem cannot be overcome, just remain confident and positive.

Dear Mita,
I passed my H.S.C. this year. This girl called D was a very good friend of mine. We've known each other for a long time. We went to the same teacher for private tuition. She was a very good friend but some months ago she told me that she loves me very much and wants to marry me. I tried to make her understand that this is not the right time to do this but she wouldn't understand. Now she isn't talking to me. How can I get back the friendship I had with her?

Dear MNH,
Your friend seems to be a little immature. She needs to grow up and understand that love and friendship, although close, are two different things. Love can grow and evolve out of friendship but it cannot be rushed or forced. Please make her understand that neither are you ready for a long-term relationship nor have you decided on your long-term partner. If she still does not understand then you will have to do without her friendship.

Dear Mita,
I'm a 23-year-old girl. A few years ago I had sat for my S.S.C. exam but couldn't pass it. I couldn't continue my studies after that due to some family problems. Now I have been admitted to Bangladesh Open University. However, my parents are forcing me to get married and are making me meet many men. Some of them liked me but after hearing about my academic background they back out. What should I do?

Dear MN,
23 is not that old at all. You should forget about everything and get to your studies. If you want to make something of our life then pick up your books and get serious. Getting a suitable husband is not the only goal of higher education. It will take only a couple of years by the end of which you would have increased your confidence and self esteem. I am sure you will get a suitable husband in the process.

Dear Mita,
I'm an M.Com. accounting student at JU. I passed my SSC, HSC and B.Com. with Second Class degrees. But now I need financial assistance to continue my studies. Is there anywhere I can apply for a scholarship or financial aid? Please help.

Dear T,
I am sorry, but I cannot help you. I know that Dhaka University gives scholarships to very meritorious students. You must seek advice from someone else on this.



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