Know You're A Little Slow When…
You got locked in a grocery store and starved to death!
A doctor would live next door while you bled to death trying
to call 911!
You could not count to 21 because it is too high for your
fingers and toes!
You used a knife to bust open the door then discovered it
You were in a food market and asked where they keep the
You put lipstick on the dog to test because the bottle said
Not tested on animals and decided to try it yourself!
You stared at your kids’ juice box because it said concentrated!
You kept buying Coke bottles because it kept saying Try
You could not figure out the instructions for a pencil sharpener!
You decided not to buy your little girl a game boy because
you thought it was for boys!
You looked in an Encyclopaedia for the meaning of Practical
joke and couldn't find it!
You could not find the zipper for your pants!
face it, there are a lot of dumb people out there. Sometimes
you want to express how stupid they really are and here's
An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
As smart as bait.
Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.
Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair.
Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
Forgot to pay his brain bill.
His belt doesn't go through all the loops.
If he had another brain, it would be lonely.
Missing a few buttons on his remote control.
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
Receiver is off the hook.
Surfing in Nebraska.
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
A few cans short of a six-pack.
A few peas short of a casserole.
The cheese slid off his cracker.
Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
BOY : Since we met, I can't eat or drink...
GIRL : Why not ??
BOY : I'm broke.
BOY : May I hold your hand??
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...
GIRL : If we become engaged will you give
me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??
BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??
Man : You remind me of the sea.
Woman : Because I'm wild, romantic and
Man : NO. because you make me sick.
Wife : You tell a man something, it goes
in one ear and comes out of the other.
Husband : You tell a woman something, It
goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.
Shumi : Jamil says I'm pretty. Ashik says
I'm ugly. What do u think, Parash?
Parash : A bit of both. I think you're
Imtiaz: Mom, can I have two piece of cake?
Mom : Certainly. Take this piece and cut
it in two.
Shubro : I hate to see a girl standing
in a bus when I’m comfortable seated.
Laila : So what do you do?
Shubro: I close my eyes.
Teacher : Have you given the goldfish fresh
Pupil : No, Sir. They haven't finished
the water I gave them last week.
Mom : Why are you wiping the floor with
Son : Well, it's a sponge cake, isn't it?
It was Eid and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he
questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?"
"Doing my Eid shopping early," replied the defendant.
"That's no offense," replied the judge. "How
early were you doing this shopping?"
“Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.