Dirty Old Man: Sexually focused chronologically gifted individual.
Perverted: Sexually dysfunctional.
Serial Killer: Person with difficult-to-meet needs.
Lazy: Motivationally deficient.
Fat: Horizontally challenged.
Fail: Achieve a deficiency.
Dishonest: Ethically disoriented.
Bald: Follicularly challenged.
Clumsy: Uniquely co-ordinated.
Body Odour: Non-discretionary fragrance.
Alive: Temporarily metabolically abled.
Worst: Least best.
Wrong: Differently logical.
Ugly: Cosmetically different.
Unemployed: Involuntarily leisured.
Short: Vertically challenged.
Dead: Living impaired.
Vagrant: Non-specifically destinationed individual.
Spendthrift: Negative saver.
Drunk: Chemically inconvenienced.
Pregnant: Parasitically oppressed.
Ignorant: Knowledge-based non-possessor.
busload of politicians were driving down a country road
when, all of a sudden, the bus ran off the road and crashed
into a tree in an old farmer's field.
The old farmer, after seeing what happened, went over to
investigate. He then proceeded to dig a hole and bury the
A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed
bus and asked the old farmer where all the politicians had
The old farmer said he had buried them.
The sheriff asked the old farmer, "Were they ALL dead?"
The old farmer replied, "Well, some of them said they
weren't, but you know how them politicians lie."
couple of opposing candidates for upazila office happened
to be sitting next to each other in the local diner. One
turned to the other and said, "You know why I'm going
to win this election? Because of my 'personal touch.' For
example, I always tip waitresses really well and then ask
them to vote for me."
"Oh, really?" replied the other. "I always
tip them one taka and ask them to vote for you."
candidates for political office inadvertently scheduled
simultaneous campaign rallies in the same park of a small
town. After a lengthy round of speeches, the candidates
worked their way through the crowd -- shaking hands, kissing
babies and beaming mightily.
Suddenly, the skies opened and it began to rain. One of
the candidates fled to take shelter in a nearby restaurant
along with half a dozen regulars.
The other candidate, however, continued to move through
the crowd -- shaking hands, kissing babies, etc.
"That man's persistence yonder," observed one
of the natives, "sure makes it easy to know who to
"Yep," another native agreed. "Sure can't
see myself casting a vote for a man who hasn't the good
sense to come in out of the rain."
government employee sits in his office and out of boredom,
decides to see what's in his old filing cabinet. He pokes
through the contents and comes across an old brass lamp.
"This will look nice on my mantelpiece," he decides,
and takes it home with him.
While polishing the lamp, a genie appears and grants him
three wishes. "I wish for an ice cold diet Coke right
He gets his Coke and drinks it.
Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second
wish. "I wish to be on an island where beautiful women
Suddenly he is on an island with gorgeous females eyeing
He tells the genie his third and last wish. "I wish
I'd never have to work ever again."
POOF! He's back in his government office.