"Mps default on Tk. 8.61 cr. in phone bills”
news item, DS 27 April 2004)
Hyallowwww, Salimuddi (not real name) here; speaking from Dhaka,
(Silence, as apparently other side is responding)
I am fine, how do you do?
Children are okay. Big one is married, living in Ontario with
jamai baba; little one is doing Masters on Patriotism in Washington
No! No! He has not met Bush yet; maybe when I visit America
in July. Breakfast meeting, ha! ha! ha!
Yes! Yes! He will go as my PA; otherwise not possible.
PA; Pola Amar, ha! ha! ha!
Your Bhabi? Oh, she has resigned.
Resigned as housewife, ho! ho! ho!
Yes! She was that scared of Jalillya's 30th deadline!
Actually, she is principal of local college. You will not believe
this. She has no prior experience in teaching, not even in kindergarten.
But she is doing so well now the adjacent college is eager to
have her also.
So, tell me how is Bhabi? I still miss her koi fry. Fantastic!
Can?t forget! I can have one full plate of rice with only the
gravy, mmmh! But, after you left desh?
Yes! Yes! I became servant of the people after that, MP? Master
of People? You have not lost your sense of humour. That?s what
I like about you.
No! No! Not from Dhaka. That good bhagya I have not yet had.
But, I represent the downtrodden. I plan to tell Bush something
about them. Actually I have told my son in Washington DC to
prepare a brief on the people in my constituency. His English
is better than the professors of our universities.
Admission here? Are you crazy? Have you seen the law and order
here? Moreover, the son of the adjacent constituency is in Canada,
so the least I could do was?
Parliament? Yes! The session is on now. I am very much occupied.
I may be called any time. But the good news is I can be in Dhaka
officially. That is how I came about to phone you. It is during
the session only that we get some free time. Otherwise it is?
Why do you want to hang up? Arrey Bhai! It is I who rung you?
Long distance, so what? You must not forget I am an MP, Most
Privileged. Ha! Ha!
You talk too much rubbish these days. By going abroad you have
become more than the aangrez. Is Bhabi wearing skirt these days?
Har har har! Joking, brother, just joking.
The hectic life we lead here we could not survive without such
Just a minute, another phone is ringing. No, no! Don?t hang
up! It will take only a few minutes anyway. It?s probably someone
from my elaka; avoiding is also difficult.
Don?t worry about the bill. It will be taken care of; if not
by this parliament than by the next.
What statement in parliament? That?s all they can do; give statements.
They will not get the money from any of us ? past, present and
Arrey Bhai! We use the phone for official purposes only. We
have to contact so many persons to solve the problems of our
people. They depend on us. They do not have phones, you know.
Yes! Of course! Perfect unity among all parties. Bhai, these
are the reasons why we take so much trouble and sacrifice so
much. It?s only a phone call, man!
What man on the other phone?
Oh, him! He can wait. He is my confirmed voter, a vote bank
member you could say.
Then do some thing. Go and do whatever you were doing and come
back after say ten minutes or so. In the meantime I will finish
talking to this guy; such bother. But don?t hang up. It is very
difficult to get international connection at this time. Tell
you what I will even put on some Bangla music. That you always
It?s no use protesting. Listen, I did not go to the session
because I wanted to talk with you.
Quorum! Don?t worry about quorum. It will follow its natural
course. They mean Maghrib but write Asar time.
Ten minutes is all I ask. And hey! If after ten minutes you
find I am still busy on the other phone, come back after another
ten fifteen minutes, but don?t hang up. I must tell you what
our friend nak-kata Kamailya said to his shalika?
(After 27 minutes.)
Hyallow, Hyallow? (tap, tap, tap) Stupid chap. Told him to hold
the line, but he has cut it. This is the problem. When they
manage to stay abroad for one two years they forget how life
was in Bangladesh.
Thukku: Lawmakers slam minister for 'erroneous' list
of defaulters (DS, 28 April 2004)