<%-- Page Title--%> Write to Mita <%-- End Page Title--%>

<%-- Volume Number --%> Vol 1 Num 157 <%-- End Volume Number --%>

June 4, 2004

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Dear Mita,
I'm a student of Notre Dame College living in a mess. My roommate is my total opposite. His family is well-off and he's not serious in his studies. He's more absorbed in indecent books and magazines and teasing girls living in the nearby flat. He wants to involve me in his activities and is always disturbing me. I can move any time, but our families are on good terms, which I don't want to spoil. How can I stop him from bothering me.

Dear M,
In such matters there should be no hesitation in your decision. You should tell him outright that you do not appreciate his activities and if he does not mend his ways then you will move out. It does not matter if your families are on good terms. Knowing him I am sure that they will understand and will not blame you for it. Learning to cope with different kinds of situations is a part of growing up. Some decisions are not pleasant but are, however, necessary. The sooner you take them the better.

Dear Mita,
I'm a 17-year-old girl studying at a reputed school in Noakhali. I have been in love with my cousin, who studies at Chittagong University, for four years. We have a good relationship and I have always tried to express my feelings to him. Judging from his behaviour, I thought he loved me too. Last March, when he came home, I told him about my feelings but he rejected me saying it was impossible for him. But as far as I know, he's still not involved with anyone else. I can't think of anyone but him. What can I do?

Dear R,
A relationship can only flourish if two people are in consent about it. If for some reason he does not love you then you will have to accept it gracefully. Just because he is not involved with anyone does not indicate that he is available for you. Moreover, he never made any commitment to you, it was your perception and you might have been mistaken. I know that this is not very pleasant but sometimes it is better to face reality quickly and move ahead. You must put this behind you as soon as possible, I am sure that future will bring many pleasant surprises for you.

Dear Mita,
I am 20, studying geography at the University of Dhaka and am about to sit for my First Year final exams. A close relative has made it known that he intends for me to marry his daughter. This girl is a bright and talented student of Class 6 who is good-looking as well. She comes from a good family and my own family will agree to the proposal. The problem is that she is much younger than me, not less than eight years. I don't know whether it will be right of me to agree to this proposal. Please help.

Dear MSH,
Even you are too young to take decisions on marriage. In this day and age any suggestion of marriage with a girl of Class 6 should be totally discouraged. It does not matter at all if she is from a good family, is good looking or bright. The simple fact is that she is too young. Please do not get involved in such serious matters. You still have far to go and lots to accomplish before you take decisions about your life partner.







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