did the chicken cross
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it
with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it
crossed, I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens
will be free to cross roads without having their motives called
GRANDP A: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed
the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road,
and that was good enough for us.
ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.
SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and
we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on
RONALD REAGAN: What chicken?
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes.
How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?
MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road.
Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever
motive there was.
FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned why the chicken
crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 98, which will not
only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents,
and balance your chequebook. Internet Explorer is an inextricable
part of eChicken.
EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the
road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.
What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?
IMMANUEL KANT: The chicken was acting out of a sense of duty
to cross the road, as chickens have traditionally crossed
roads throughout history.
THE BIBLE: And God came down from the heavens, and He said
unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And
the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS (Kentucky Fried Chicken): I missed one?
RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat,
the chicken did not cross the road. I don't know any chickens.
I have never known any chickens.
workers were walking through a rough part of the city one
evening. They heard moans and muted cries for help from a
back alley. Upon investigation, they found a semi-conscious
man in a pool of blood.
"Help me, I've been mugged and beaten," he pleaded.
The two social workers turned and walked away. One remarked
to her colleague, "You know, the person who did this
really needs help."
are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging
their right foot as they walk. As they meet, one man looks
at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says, “Vietnam,
The other points his thumb behind him and says, "Dog
crap, 20 feet back.”