I am 23. I used to like an Irish girl, when I was in Ireland.
She used to like me as well. I was about to marry her, but
suddenly I realised that my family is not going to accept
it because she is Christian. A month later, I moved to London
to go to university. Last month, I went there to meet with
some of my friends. I met her and again became emotional when
she said that she still likes me. I don't want to lose her
and I don't want to lose my parents either. My parents are
very conservative and they sent me here to study. They are
still helping me a lot. On the other hand, if I take too long
to decide, I'm going to lose her as she is not a Bangali girl
and will not wait for me. What can I do?
Intercultural and interfaith marriages are becoming more and
more common nowadays. Parents are much more accepting than
they used to be. The most important thing for you is to decide
whether this is the right girl for you. If you are serious
and truly in love then your parents will accept it someday.
You must continue to study and establish yourself first. Remember,
parents always want the best for their children, it is for
you to convince them that any decision you take is in your
I'm 14 and go to one of the best schools in Dhaka. I have
an older brother who is 16. He bullies me, calls me names
and says bad things to me. I tell him not to but he still
does it. He doesn't even listen to my mother when she tells
him to stop. Do I just have to continue taking this torture?
What should I do?
There is no reason to tolerate this torture. If he is being
a bully then somebody should tell him so and make him stop.
Have a serious talk with him and find out what his problem
is. Often older brothers do not realise that their jokes often
end up hurting their siblings. Brothers also ignore the reality
that a younger sister is not necessarily a baby but, rather,
a growing teenager who needs to be treated with respect and
dignity. However, I still believe that he is being insensitive
rather than vicious. You should be able to sort it out through
I appeared for my Masters exams last year but my results aren't
out yet. In the meantime, I'm working as a government primary
school teacher. I don't like the job and want to change it.
Teaching children is tough. I get a headache from having to
speak loudly in class and am dead tired by the time I get
home. As a result, I can't study for different competitive
exams. My colleagues are also a lot older than I am and I
don't really get along with them. They make me do a lot of
extra tasks and I don't even have time to study at work. But
my parents want me to work here until I find a better job.
What should I do? Should I quit?
I think your parents are right in the sense that you should
not quit till you find another job. It is easier to find a
job when you already have one. On the other hand, keep on
looking and I am sure that soon you will find something suitable.
It is true that teaching children is not easy and perhaps
you should look for something that you like, perhaps teaching
older children. As for studying for competitive exams, well,
you will have to make that extra time and just do it. This
is the time for you to work hard and get ahead in life. Whatever
you do now will reward you in future.
(R) thedailystar.net 2005