Dodging the Loogie
Imran H. Khan
It has become a common ritual for us to take the blessings of our elders before doing anything important, be it while going to an exam, for some sports event, a job interview or to go on a long journey. While some of us tend to bow before elders and touch their feet; others simply tend to be more 'modern' with just a salute with the hand. However, the universal code of giving one's blessing has been taken one step ahead by our elders and they tend to blow on us three times to ward off evil while some, deplorably, tend to spit on the subject. This is not one of those full flagrant spits that we had witnessed in the blockbuster Titanic. This is sort of a dry fake spit that, supposedly, scares the wits off the evil spirits. But then there are times when our elders lose control and some loogie tends to make their way at you. I feel for you.
Anyway, I was really enthralled at the idea of an alternative to the blessings of elders. Not that I had anything against it, I mean I have come this far on 'Maaer Doa' but it is interesting to learn something new. That is when my sister came forward with an idea about the spirit world and an internet site that sold spells. Pretty hip! I was a little amused at first. Spells? Were they not somehow associated with witchcraft and superstitions? What footing could they have in modern grounds? Nonetheless, I was not about to let an interesting notion pass me by.
California Astrology Association, established in 1970, has a web page copious with spells. Their web link is www.calastrology.com. At this link, are spells for every occasion. Wanga dolls, Spells, Good luck pieces, Voodoo dolls are all but common items on this site and they are all up for grabs. "Looking for help in Relationships? Need more money? Want to right a wrong? You've come to the right place." This is the place for you. There were some spells that I thought could be quite useful for us (not to mention the added incentive of not having to dodge loogies).
A spell called "The Strike it Rich Spell" is specifically designed to open windows of opportunity where doors have long been closed. The object of this 'spell' that costs only $25, is to put you in the right place at the right time and in so doing, will give you opportunity to strike it rich. I think this particular abracadabra will sell like hot cakes in Dhaka. Maybe some day vendors by the traffic signals will have books and magazines in one hand and Spell-cans on the other!
Another spell that seemed appropriate for the disenchanted is the "Terminator Spell" - the king of spells. If someone is standing in the way of your happiness and success, you can get this spell to 'terminate' the evil in your life. Whether you want to end an unlucky streak, remove a rival or even the score with an enemy, this spell stands at the top of the list. I always had bad blood with this Statistics teacher, hmm... The "Come Back My Love Spell" will also be a hit here in Dhaka. This spell will plant the seeds necessary for love to blossom and initiate the return of the lover who had left. Forces of nature can be controlled now, for only 19.95 dollars. Last but not least, "The Luck Spell" for $19.95 is a sure alternative to the loogie attack from murobbees. "Luck, as someone once said, is a fickle lady. It's as unpredictable as the wind and can bring incredible rewards, or devastating failure, often depending on whether you are at the right place at the right time -- or, perhaps, at the wrong place at the wrong time." Would it not be convenient if you could somewhat change your luck from time to time and know that you are in control? A powerful psychic, who has cast spells for some of the most famous and powerful people on earth, has agreed to cast a "Luck Spell" for the 'clients' of the California Astrology Association. What is most interesting is that most of the spells in this site have a life of about a year, and if nothing occurs during that period, then one can get his/her full money back, no questions asked.
I cannot imagine that there are people that still believe in the mystical world, but from the looks of it, these spells are a sure shot. Let's see. The blessings of the elderly, in my case, have ended up with me having a head full of white locks. These spells, on the other hand, offer little or no side effects. Frankly speaking, I would try any of these spells if it meant that I could escape from the attack of the loogie.
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