Write to Mita
I'm very disillusioned with life. I feel that it was wrong that I was brought into the world and that we should not bring more children into this world of conflict and strife. I have a loving family and friends, though I'm not too close with either. I'm in a relationship; I have a job that I enjoy. Yet I find life meaningless. I don't find significance or beauty in anything except in music, poetry, theatre and the like, and in seeking knowledge. I don't believe that there is an afterlife and I just don't know what we're here for. I don't feel like living at all. Is there any help for me?
Disillusioned with Life
No, I am afraid there is no help for you unless you decide that you want to change the way you think and feel. I suggest that you look around and see what is going on. Try to understand the suffering of millions of people on the verge of starvation, indignity and insecurity. Look at the children on the streets and see the hopelessness of their lives. Then sit for a while and count your blessings. The fact that you can enjoy the luxury of poetry, music and theatre itself says a lot about the class in which you belong. Go out and do something for someone, you will find meaning and fulfilment.
I'm a chocoholic. No, really, it's as if I'm addicted to chocolates. I can't go a day without them and sometimes I just binge on it alone (as some people binge on normal food) sometimes to the point where I feel physically unwell. I eat chocolate when I'm happy, when I'm sad, alone, with friends and colleagues, just anytime, anywhere. I'm not overweight or diabetic at this point, but I'm only 24 (and a woman). Do you think this will cause a lot of problems in future? And if I should change this habit, how?
If you are not over weight or diabetic then I do not think this will be such a problem. However, you should consult a doctor soon and find out. Habits are hard to break but you should never become a slave of your habit. Fight this mentally and psychologically. Try to reduce your intake of chocolate gradually. You will be surprised how quickly the body adjusts or gets used to change if brought on slowly. However, having chocolate is fun and you don't have to give it up completely.
I'm a 32-year-old married woman. I say married, but not happily married. I don't have any problems with my husband who I married for love, but now I'm attracted to other people's husbands and also younger men. I'm not quite ready to leave the shelter and security of my married life, but I'm not sure how I should deal with my feelings either. Is this a phase due to my age and the fact that I've been married four years? Or is it a problem I should take up and handle somehow, and if so, how? If it's this way only four years into my marriage, what will I do the rest of my life?
Well, I hope this is a phase, otherwise you are in a lot of trouble. You need to take a very hard look at yourself, your values and beliefs. If you are no longer in love with your husband (which might happen) then you should admit it and leave him. You need to be honest with yourself as well as with your husband. However, if you take my opinion then this kind of dilly dallying will lead you to disaster. Younger men and other women's husbands can only offer you a very brief thrill but nothing more.
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