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     Volume 6 Issue2 | January 19, 2007 |

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Write to Mita

Dear Mita,
I'm a 24-year-old woman. But I look and feel much older than I really am. First of all, my hair is already turning white and I just look older than 24. Secondly, when my friends are all having fun and enjoying themselves, I don't feel like joining them. I'm involved in a lot of activities and keep very busy, but I'm not exactly having fun. Do you think there is a relation between my looking and feeling older? And what should I do about it? I'd like to think I haven't yet lived even half of my life and I don't want it to become a drag so early.
Old at Heart

Dear Old at Heart,
The saying “old is as old as you feel” is true. At 24, many have whitening hair. This is not a big issue at all. There are tons of products available, which will take care of it. It is about valuing your time, your friends and relatives and counting the blessings that God has bestowed on you. Try to bring some meaning to life instead of grumbling about white hair. Enjoy life while you can because there might come a time that you will not have the time to do so. Changing the way you look is the easy part, it is changing the way you feel that is important.

Dear Mita,
I am 14 years old. I have a feeling that people don't like me. They make fun of me; they use me play pranks on me and think that I can't do anything. They think that I'm dumb, weak and always a failure. Even my parents don't support me, in fact, they suspect me. On the other hand, I am very shy to prove that I am not dumb. I care about my friends and family very much. I try to keep all the people around me happy but they don't care. I know that you are going to advise me to be more confident but whenever I try to be confident, people make fun of me. I am good at my studies and very ambitious, so I deserve to have real friends and get enough support from my family but no one ever tries to understand me. Please tell me, what should I do?

Dear Desperate,
If friends, relatives and parents are being so insensitive then it is their problem. Someday they will realise their mistake and come to you to apologise. Meanwhile, don't give up your ambitions or dreams for anything. This is what will take you to success and then you will be the envy of your family and friends. Don't let anyone destroy your self-confidence; you know you are better than them.

Dear Mita,
What makes a relationship strong and what weakens it? If you like someone, how can you know whether that person likes you or not?

Dear Z,
I am afraid, this is not a question that can be asked or answered in one sentence, however, I will try. A relationship is strong when there is mutual trust and respect between two people. When there is flexibility and an effort to accept each with faults and follies. It is weakened when there is a lack of faith, trust and respect. When one wants to dominate the other person's thoughts and actions and there is no tolerance for difference of opinion. How do you know if someone likes you? Well, trust your instinct -- it is mostly right.


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