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Thought of the week:

"You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.''
-- George W. Bush

Hey all,
Hope you had a great week, barring the hartals. I am getting so fed up of being cooped up at home, so much so, that I actually look forward to going to my classes these days, even when they're from 9 am to 5 pm!

Okay, in case you're wondering why I quoted Bush today, it's because February 21 is coming up, and I guess I don't have to remind you that it's International Mother's Language Day. I can't help but wonder what drove the good citizens of the US of A to vote for someone who mangles their mother tongue in such a brutal fashion…
I've started getting replies with suggestions for music albums. It seems that a lot of people are listening to rap these days. Eminem seems to be a popular choice…any contenders? Oh, I hear the new RAAGA album is out. Anyone heard it yet?

And also speaking of music, flip to page three as Maliha Bassam takes you back to the RC Cola Live and Louder concert. Our literature lady also tells you about the complicated structure of the high school society on the cover. It's all music and love as we observe the mushiest Shout Out ever on page two. Too bad many of the cool things we talked about in our previous issue went down the drain with the hartals…yes, I do seem to have a bee in my bonnet about them.

Anyway, I've got to jet now. Take care, and see you next week!

Send your polls, opinions, and queries to thegirlnextdoor1@hotmail.com or teteatete_tgnd@yahoo.com

By The Girl Next Doo

Top ten signs you are on a bad date!

10. Your date refused to pay for your dinner and he didn't even let you eat anything, attacking the food himself!

9. When he asked you if you wanted to do something different on your first date, you never imagined it would be an extensive fungus tour of the city!

8. Things were ok until you realized that he was wearing neon green trousers and a pink T-shirt with an "I Love Donald Duck" printed on it, under that dark coat that you first mistook as being 'normal'.

7. While at the movies he tried to impress you by eating popcorn with his toes!

6. She is the first woman you've dated who tried to imitate Charlie Chaplin, and thinks she's doing a pretty good job of it too!

5. When you open the door, the second thing you noticed is the number 666 tattooed on his forehead!

4. Before tonight, you have never seen anyone suck spaghetti up his or her nose!

3. Unknown to you, one of the conditions of the date was that her Mom, Dad, Big brother and sister, Aunt Sokina and Uncle Ronju, and cousins Suzanna, Fatema, Safa, Golap and Beli (she lives in a joint family), also accompany you as chaperones!

2. The five tattoos spelling Barb, Bertha, Brenda, Beatrice and Betty that are scratched on his forearm startled you--especially when your name is Bonnie!

And the number one sign that you are on a bad date is: 1. Two words--pierced eyelids!

By Jennifer Ashraf

Shout Out

Hey people!
First of all, I need to thank all of you for making our Valentines Special a success by sending in all your shouts. We really owe it to you. Our Valentines Special continues this week with all your 'special' messages. Hope we can rekindle the magic of Valentines for everyone out there. Keep sending in your messages to shout13@gmail.com !
Though we're far apart, our true love will someday just attach us with Superglue :-) jaanu, love ya. Happy Valentine's day Tahsin"

To - Bimurto tomake
Dear some things are better unspoken . …. … 143
Lots of lichis…lol…bye
From - Chondrokona

You are my love.
I am really sorry for my behavior and hope you can forgive me. But it is true that I love you. Without you I can't live or continue my studies.
- Shawon

Hi SHORMI (f&b, RU)!!
On Valentines Day I just wanted to let you know that I love you very much and always will ...Masud, mgt, RU.

My shona Zeovic,
I used to hate V-day, but now that you're in my life I think I'm gonna love it! Here's wishing you our first ever Valentine's Day...I LOVE YOU BABY!
your Picku

Magical Hot Babe
I'm sowwy about what I said... I love you.. I wish I could be there with you on this valentines…but that ain't going to happen... love you sweetheart... and sowwy for everything

Hi Bebe,
trying soul and hard to contact you since I heard that you broke your leg! Hope you
start running again soon and run straight to me at my place. Call me just as you
read this. I've got lots of yummy gossip. Stomach full, can't wait 2 throw up at
u! See you soon!

Hi Nawar
I don't know if you still remember Willes' memories; but I just want to say that I miss you. This is because I love you a lot. I love you more than anyone, except your parents of course.
From Someone-you-never-ever-dreamed-of-hearing-this.

Dear Lupppoooo,
Happy 14th Feb......smoking can be quit. USA can be left. Mercedes can be forgone. Affluence can be left. But to leave you is impossible. My love for you can't be surpassed by considering any worldly facts.
Bye. Big hugs.

Dear Raisa,
Yes you read in The Aga Khan School. Uttara. I love you. I loved you
from the first sight of you. You know me. But you don't know that I liked you.
I will tell you who I am after some time. You can mail me at this address

To psychodevil
I knew I was in love with you when I saw the world in your eyes and your eyes everywhere in the world. Sweetheart, whenever you draw your breath, know that I am thinking about you. You have invaded my thoughts, penetrated my soul, and beautified my life...extravagantly. I LOVE YOU jaan....
from Sady

Dear RB,
Thanks for coming in my life and being my Valentine. May Allah bless you and Inshallah you will do good in your O level and also Inshallah success will always be on your side. Take care. Love you..RBBS
From BB

Dear Nabila,
Lives are for living I live for you
Dreams are for dreaming I dream for you
Hearts are for beating mine beats for you
Angels are for keeping. Can I keep you?
Happy Valentines day!!!!!
LovEyou so much.......

Hey Omar(hablu gablu),
Don't plan to jump over 'The Flame' right in this valentine's day because you may get burnt. LOL. Happy valentine's day to you and our sweet Bonhy bhabi.
Your all time boss-shoaib

Hey Sil!
You know, even you're miles away
from me now, I still love you abnormally.
Happy Valentine's Day, sweetie.
Love ya lotz!

Hey guys,
I wish all my friends a very happy Valentines Day! Lots of love for Moonmoon, Alifa, Peony, Riddhi, Meghla, Tushi, Urmi, Abonty. Enjoy.
Love you guys

By the Hitch-hiker
[ ATTENTION: This column is NOT responsible for any negative (or otherwise) outcome of the messages printed in it. Please do NOT abuse the column by using it to play pranks etc. Also, all personal information including email addresses and telephone numbers will be printed at the sender's expense and we do NOT take ANY responsibility for any inconvenience to anyone. ]

Dead Husbands

A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time.
"How wonderful! But I hope you don't mind me asking what happened to your first husband?"
"He ate poisonous mushrooms and died."
"Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?"
"He ate poisonous mushrooms, too, and died."
"Oh, how terrible! I'm almost afraid to ask you about your third husband."
"He died of a broken neck."
"A broken neck?"
"He wouldn't eat the mushrooms."

Check it out

February 15 marked the 36 death anniversary of Shaheed Sgt. Johrul Haque. He was martyred in 1969, during the Agortola conspiracy, while he was imprisoned at the Dhaka Cantonment. He was a strong voice in the movement against the oppression by the Pakistani government.
Three decades later, this brave martyr is remembered through a painting exhibition for children on February 25, at the Liberation Museum (5, Segun Bagicha), at 10 am.
On behalf of the family of the late Sgt. Johrul Haque

Nazneen Haque Mimi

Night At The Barn

A lawyer and two friends--a Rabbi, and a Hindu holy man--had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer.
The farmer said, "There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for two to sleep in the house. So one of you must sleep in the barn."
"No problem," chimed the Rabbi. "My people wandered in the desert for forty years. I am humble enough to sleep in the barn for one evening."
With that he departed to the barn, and the others bedded down for the night.
Moments later a knock was heard at the door; the farmer opened the door. There stood the Rabbi from the barn. "What's wrong?" asked the farmer. He replied, "I am grateful to you, but I just can't sleep in the barn.
There is a pig in the barn, and my faith believes that is an unclean animal."
His Hindu friend agrees to swap places with him. But a few minutes later the same scene reoccurs. There is a knock on the door. "What's wrong?" the farmer asks. The Hindu holy man replies, "I, too, am grateful for your helping us out, but there is a cow in the barn. In my country cows are considered sacred and I can't sleep on holy ground!"
That left only the lawyer to make the change. He grumbled and complained, but went out to the barn. Moments later there was another knock on the farmer's door. Frustrated and tired, the farmer opens the door, and there stood the pig and the cow.

In a story titled "Coincidence" published in our Jan 13 issue, the name of the author Tridib Shaha was accidentally dropped. We regret the inconvenience caused.
RS Desk


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