Imprisoned by rain
We at RS know that not only every one is like Adnan, who keeps jumping up and down when the rainy season comes. Of course that is because he is a poet and poets for some reasons find the rainy season very conducive to their em…talent. Lets not argue about that, shall we. Anyways, rainy days are depressing. And like all depression, you prolly need a few ways to shake it. Don't stress- your good friend reggie, is here to help. Just don't blame me, if it doesn't work on you.
1. Play Strategy Games
2. Watch a Serial on DVD
3. Watch an entire Cricket Test Match
4. Get Wet in the Rain
5. Play a muddy game of football
6. Get a Job: Teach some kids
7. Just plain Adda
8. Try out Drawing
9. Study…if you are not into anything cool
Right now, I can't think of a tenth point. It could be sleeping or just plain and simple sitting around and doing nothing like a lazy sod. So I guess I would leave you at that.
Frustrated young minds
Sagar wakes up late every morning and struggles to get dressed and leave for class on time. He does this because he goes to sleep very late after staying awake countless ours brooding over useless thoughts. His mind is constantly filled with the expensive things his affluent friends can buy, his tumultuous performance in class, the girl he couldn't have, etc, etc, etc.
It's almost shocking how many teenagers and young adults share his dilemmas and are burdened with these same thoughts everyday. And it all sums up to only one thing that needs to be addressed- frustration!
Another boy, Jami, an A level candidate, likes to hang out with his friends and also to study and get his school work done on time. However, he believes his performance is on a downhill slope suffocated by the pressure from his parents to study more.
“It becomes very depressing when my parents keep saying 'poro poro' all the time! I enjoy studying but it's not the only thing I ever want to do! I want to spend some of my time with my friends as well!” Children from middle and lower middle class families have to meet often unrealistic expectations of families who end up doing more harm than good, creating pressure, frustration and ultimately-break down!
Nasim, a student of a public university coming from an impoverished rural family, is the only one among fourteen siblings who is studying at a university.
Having to shoulder the responsibility of the education of his younger brothers and sisters while working on his own studies, he has to bear his educational and day-to-day expenses, which sometimes surpass his meagre income as a private tutor. In addition, he also sends money to his family in the village. “It is very hard to concentrate in studies with so many problems looming over me,” he says. He is unsure how long his good grades will remain unscathed by his troubled mind.
Lack of open-mindedness and conservative streaks in parents is another reason for the frustration building up in young people. “I want to do a part time job but my parents won't allow it,” says Lima, a sophomore in another private university.
“I face many problems which I cannot share with my parents. They try to judge me by the standard of their generation but our time and their time cannot be judged on the same standards.” says Nabila, an HSC candidate. And of course it can't.
Many parents are ultra-protective about their daughters, restricting their child's activities to studies and family activities, a situation that can only lead to disaster.
“From my days in college I've been seeing my female friends go freely to many places. I could not even retain my membership at Bishwo Shahitto Kendro because I was not allowed to go there on my own,” regrets Naz, a fourth year university student. Like her many others are left alone at home being laughed at by their friends because their parents refuse to progress beyond the 18th century! Even our neighbouring countries would never believe, that in this day and age, young girls here aren't allowed to go places using public transport like buses or CNG scooters. Somehow, cars have earned the reputation of being 'safe' while all other alternatives are not!
Many of those studying in a private university suffer when they have to mingle with richer students who can afford more accessories and gadgets and lead a more affluent life. Mp3 players, pen drives and iPods have become popular to the extent that to not have one can instantly make you an outcast in many social circles. This shows just how shallow we have let ourselves become.
Psychologist Shakowath Sharif of Monobikash Foundation says that most of his patients are young adults or university students and they mainly suffer from depression. Children want to be more independent but they cannot discuss their social priorities with elders because of the existing social system. They are increasingly being distanced from parents,” said Shakowath.
“The case where a boy is regretting because he does not have an expensive pen drive is the case of identity crisis. Those suffering from it think that the people they are seeing around them are the whole world. They cannot appreciate what they have --like good food, home etc. It is a kind of parental failure. Parents have to stimulate children's minds so that they know about the external world, the world of have-nots,” said Shakowath.
Parents are protective about their daughters because they do not feel safe to let them go on their own into the existing law and order situation. But what they don't understand is that sometimes letting them go is the best they can do for them! We have an upside down social system and it takes a lot to be a 'good' girl or boy in our standards, but to limit these youngsters to the confines of a frustrated mind is depriving the same system of its only way to salvation.
By Durdana Ghias
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