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The week in re(ar)view

Fish enjoying relief goods
A fisherman netted 12 pieces of corrugated iron (CI) sheets meant for the destitute from the river Chuna by the Sundarbans. Influential local political leaders being panic-stricken at the thought of being arrested by law enforces donated the iron sheets to the fishes. Turns out the fishes don't really care about iron sheets because they don't need a roof protecting them. They already live IN water!

Prince of corruption
History was made on 8th March when the infamous Tarique Rahman (son of Khaleda Zia and crown prince of corruption) was given a ride in a RAB vehicle. It must have been an especially memorable ride for him as RAB vehicles do not have climate control, DVD players or even leather seats. It's a big surprise as a man thought untouchable suddenly became very touchable albeit with a long pointy stick.
Currently he is busy swatting flies in his jail cell.

Gone to the animals
A mini zoo was discovered at former state minister for power, Iqbal Hassan Mahmood Tuku’s house. A group of 34 wild animals and birds were found. He is among a few other politicians who built a zoo inside their houses. No wonder no one goes to the zoo anymore when all the animals are locked up in different ministers' houses.

One such animal loving minister had 37 deer. Apparently you need permission to rear deer. Question is, what do you do with so many?

Partying on the beach
Beach parties could have been the next in-thing only if the BNP government was allowed to rule a little longer. The Awami League government (1996-2001), during its term, also allotted 10 plots to ten businessmen. Ex-ministers have managed to take over Cox's Bazar's coastline allotting 90 plots on the beach to its top leaders for setting up hotels and motels. Naturally they were violating all known rules. Of course, breaking rules is what parties are all about. Sadly our hopes of seeing swimsuit models splashing out on Bangladeshi soil are dashed.

Complete ban on all sorts of political activities
The caretaker government feels that politicians have stretched their vocal chords too much to the point of snapping. In consideration, the government has slapped a complete ban on all sorts of political activities, including indoor politics, processions and meetings, across the country until further order.

In the meantime Hasina has decided to spend the time writing. Other politicians have decided to learn HOW to write.

EC wants more powerrrrrrrrr
The Election Commission (EC) has made a move for reviving the power to punish any person for contempt of the EC, similar to what the High Court Division enjoys. Anyone breathes and they could be in trouble. That's scary. The EC is also in favour of reviving another provision, barring any appeal against the EC’s decision to punish a person for its contempt. So they can do anything and get away with it too.

Legal experts, however, said the EC cannot be provided with such power as it is not a court of law. We hope not.

By Gokhra and Mood Dude


Things not to say

To a guy with goatee- “An old lady from the village called, she wants her little goat's beard back.”

To an actor/actress from T.V. - “Boy, they must put a lot of makeup on you.”

To a bald guy- “So…which brand of gel do you use?”

To a guy asking for directions- Say nothing….just stare at him, wearing a dumfounded expression on your face.

To your little brother- “Do you know that dipping pineapple in milk makes it taste like chocolate?”

To a guy sitting with his girlfriend- “Dude, where did you get the new one from?”

To a “Harry Potter” fan- “Harry Potter won't die in the next movie instead he will be turned into a 60 year old guy by a spell and Sylvester Stallone will play the role in the movie.”

To a guy who has just said “You can say that again.”- “That again.”

To a male interior decorator/fashion designer/dancer- “You aren't gay? Now are you?”

To a Chinese/Japanese guy after forcing him to jump from a roof- “Now you tell me that you don't know martial art and can't soar through air.”

By Sadman Alvi


Cool Adda

Location: Roadside Drain By Geneva Camp

What To Bring: A wet suit, a fishing rod, a water-proof bag, air-tight food container, pocket change, a jar and a small bird-cage.

What to Do: Sit inside the drain and quietly observe your surroundings. Engage in casual conversation with your fellow mates who you have brought along; and on some occasions with passer-bys. Place your pocket change on a piece of paper before you and watch it grow (it might even decrease, you never know).

Pay attention to the constant flow of the water, below you. You'll be surprised at the variety of objects that can be found in this modern day spring. Now it's best to have two friends along with you. Maintain your distance so as to not disturb or irritate the free flow of the water.

You can use your fishing rods to capture tadpoles and on a lucky day you might even catch a cat-fish! If you are really good at observation, you can actually extract many “banned” substances floating freely. Dry them carefully and put them in your bag for safekeeping. On numerous occasions you will see, feel and smell the presence of some squishy objects- these are best left alone. No, it is not your grandmother's homemade “halim”. While you chat with your friends, you can enjoy the delicacies floating under you. They maybe soggy, stale and may taste queer at first, but once you get used to the smell, they are rather tasty. They are thrown out by the numerous clean and hygienically perfect restaurants around you. For best results, starve three hours before your expedition- then trust me you will immensely enjoy the most tantalizing treat ever and best of all, it's free! You can also observe the tranquil lifestyle of the locals. The noises never die down and you can witness “Bangladesh's Most Wanted” at work, live! You can even catch sight of celebrities who keep such a low profile, some claim they are underground! All in all, it will be a satisfying experience and you will return with cool gossip, tadpoles, a stash of forbidden goodies, amazing tales and a stomach filled to the capacity! Till next time, enjoy this trip and make sure to wear clean clothes- we don't want to seem unhygienic now!

By Osama Rahman


Vox-Pop

Voice of the Population is a megaphone announcing the opinions of young minds for the country to know.

This week they let us know “Whether it was right or not that Hawkers were being removed from the streets.”

“In a way it's good because the pavements aren't going to be blocked anymore, but it's also bad because the hawkers will suffer since selling goods was their only income.” Rashila

“All I can say is that Dhaka looks better, and we can finally walk in peace. So I welcome it.” Rabib Rafiq

“Unplanned eviction is not recommended. Alternative sources of employment should be considered. Otherwise, people might resort to begging, mugging, and stealing. Because they need to survive.” Fahian

“I think it's OK. The streets now look cleaner, nicer and "walk-able"!” Anamika

“I think it is not at all right. A lot of people cannot afford to buy from supermarkets and hawkers just made it easier to get normal goods at low costs.” Mishti

“I don't think it's a good thing. Just for some space, so many people are being driven out of work. And since they don't have jobs now, they have no livelihood, and a lack of alternatives would mean that they'd be forced to go into crime … or starve to death.” Jishnu

“I think I appreciate this new policy. This is actually good for our civic society in terms of transportation and traffic jams. But on the other hand, I'm very much concerned about all the people who have lost their jobs. I hope the caretaker government will take steps to ensure that they get back their jobs.” Shaonly

“Dhaka doesn't look like Dhaka anymore! I quite miss the traders with their goods on the footpaths!” Fara

Compiled by: Iftikhar Azam
With BIG thanks to Anika, Nuzhat, Osama, Reesana, Shuprova, Emil, Nayeema, and Shehtaz


RS Mailbx

Pen name woes
I am always fascinated when it comes to reading Rising material. I admire the works of all the writers. But what bothers me is their use of pen names . If they are to send a message to us readers, we must know who we are hearing from.
Jeebon,
Preston University

Death metal done to death
In the March 1 issue of Rising Stars there was an article regarding the death metal scene in Bangladesh. Although it gave a good idea about the death metal scene in Bangladesh, the article provided incorrect information about Poison Green several times. Poison Green never was and still is not a death metal band. None of their covers (which basically include Sepultura and Pantera), singles and the album are death metal. I don't know how the writer could confuse thrash metal with death metal. It was more or less an objective article but RS got one fact wrong. Unless of course, it was the writer's own opinion; if so, then yet again it is still wrong.
The Blues Fan
Pablo


Top Tunes

Ungerground
1. Boka Manushta- Sumon & Aurthohin-
2. Shopnochura-3- Mixed album by Tony
3. Live Now- Mixed album by Ershad
4. Shorjo Dibosh- Striking
5. Adhare Apshori

Overall
1. Din Bari Jae- Bappa Mojubdar
2. Hok Kolorob- Arnob
3. Boka Manushta- Sumon & Aurthohin-
4. Prayer Hall- Bujhchho?!
5. Ichchhe- Tahsan
6. Tribute to S.D. Burman & R.D. Burman- Bappa Featuring Sandipon
7. Bandona- Mahadi
8. Shopnochura-3- Mixed album by Tony
9. Shono- Habib
10. Faissa Gechhi- Hyder Husy

Source: Piano, Sings, Ghuri.
By Sami, Shovon.
Courtesy: www.tunesbd.com


 
 

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