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Hot Spots

By The Power Of Grayskull! What the hell are they doing over there?!” (Or any other variations)

That's what many of us still-not-so-westernized-and-conservative Bangladeshis think/say/shout after passively glancing left and right when visiting some of Dhaka's hot spots.

One of the many things fledgling couples are afraid of is the first perfect date. Fact - There's no such thing as perfection. However, that doesn't, and shouldn't, stop anyone from going as close to it as humanly possible. Considering that, the frontier isn't far. At any rate, here are some neat suggestions for places to take your significant other for a date; first, last, or otherwise.

The Spots
A very common, but mostly enjoyable dating places are fast food joints. Hanging out in conditioned air and taking in some tasty food would do everyone a bit of good. Make sure to prepare well, and it's advisable to carry more than enough cash. Some personal custom touches would likely add to the charm. Oh. Choose malls and food joints carefully. Some nice and popular food joints are: Bella Italia, American Burger, Move 'n pick, Aristocrat, Cafe Mango, FFC, Western Grill, Swarma House, Candyfloss, Dhaba, etc., or any other favourite place you might have.

STAR Cineplex shows some neat movies sometimes, and Bashundhara City has lots of places to walk, talk, and eat about. A lengthy amount of (window) shopping; some wandering about and finally an hour or two of good entertainment, while sipping coke and crunching popcorn - simple, somewhat cheap and thoroughly enjoyable. Ofcourse, the company you'll keep would make anything enjoyable and the small annoyances and other cons of the place become negligible.

Going 'Wild'
Some places, of more natural elements, to meet and hangout would be Gulshan Park or Dhanmondi Lake, though, the enjoyability factor might be questionable and some may call it quite a clichéd or 'khaet' area.

But, a quaint and scenic spot would be the park-slash-yard of Shongshodh Bhobon, where quite a many sort of people go to have a fun time. The place is somewhat homely and more in touch with Mother Nature than the sites mentioned above. However, do make sure to avoid going there when the sun's up and about or you might be returning with some unwanted sun burns. Otherwise, the wind in your face would make you feel like flying.

If you're at the artsy type, you can try the museums, or the art exhibitions, plays and cultural demonstrations and so on that occur scattered about the city. Enact romances, and recite epic poetry together, and what not. Everything's fun and good, if it's in your taste. The Dhaka University campus holds some great and monumental landmarks that might be unknown to some of you. Venture out there, read the footnotes and find out more about your splendid culture. Buy some Vel Puries, a glass of coke, and look about at the wonders and great history beheld before you.

Going Local
Going a bit more local might make the whole thing a lot more meaningful and very cosy. But, ofcourse, it all depends. The rooftop would be one of the most 'local' places. The higher you are, the better, really. Make sure to bring both your favourite food stuffs and drinks, sheets of your choice, decors and all the works. Set the 'table' and enjoy. Doing this before dusk has its perks. The weather won't usually be too hot, but a bit windy, with an orange sky overheard. You might be able to see the moon on one side, and the sun on the other. Keep your eyes sharp and enjoy that beautiful sunset, afterwards. When all's said and done, be sure to tidy up and not leave anything behind.

Each other's rooms may possibly be your favourite choice. Unless it's the trophy holder for messiness and untidiness, where undergarments are shamelessly strewn about, giving of a certain intolerable stench only you've gotten used to, by living in it for a decade, decades or more. This sort of room usually belongs to guys. With exceptions, ofcourse. At any rate, provided it's inhabitable, hang and talk about in your own rooms, eat, drink, relax, do nothing and just enjoy and relish the wonderful time you're having - provided, your parents know about it. Otherwise, don't get caught. Additionally, be good.

OR. Forget everything, throw this paper away and steal/gather a large chunk of money. Then, travel the World and the Seven Seas, and just like everybody else, look for something. This would be Going Global. (WARNING - NOT ENTIRELY SAFE.)

Whatever you do, be sure to have fun, prove to be a delightful companion and good luck!

By Emil



Men are dogs, women are cats

The now popularized saying “All men are dogs” is not as offensive as most males think. In fact this statement is a compliment of the highest order and one should be glad to have received it. Women contrary to popular belief (like every other thing) are not vixens but actually cats. Elton J. on the other hand (the non-existent third hand) is an insult to all men, real men, in this world. To understand the whole concept, read on and pay close attention to every line, sentence, word and punctuation because otherwise you wont understand anything and if you go long on enough without noticing the punctuations, you will die. Punctuations make you breathe and breath keeps you alive, so you catch my drift, right?

Men Go Woof While Barking Orders
To understand why men are labeled as “dogs”, let us ponder the characteristics of the “dog”. Dogs are generally gentle creatures. They are very loving; show their affection without hesitation and their specialty is their loyalty. They also take immense care of their loved ones and guard their significant others with their lives. Dogs may not mate for life but that is the case with the maximum of the creatures. These canines are playful and like to hang around with their friends. They like horsing around and having a good time in general. Dogs are not known to complain and it is quite difficult to dislike dogs. Dogs have a lot of energy and thus they make a lot of pals. Looking at these facts a man will see the striking resemblance that he has with dogs. Considering these, he will realize that the statement that men are dogs is actually a compliment. Men can command situations just like man's best friend and like dogs men only wage war for territories and to win the affection or guard someone they like. So men are dogs and yeah that is a compliment.

Cat's claws and Women's nails
Women are cats. Don't ask why yet because a full explanation is to follow. Let us analyze cats. Cats are sulky and extremely hard to please. Cats are prone to repetitive mood swings and their playful nature is only witnessed when they have a ball of strings to play with. Like women, cats like garments, which is not at all clever. Cats eat less, even when they are hungry and they also “act” clean. A cat spends most of its time cleaning itself and the environment around it, even when there are others to do so. They just are never satisfied with anything. No matter what you do for them, they still feel as if they are the boss. Feed them, love them and/or take care of them, cats still feel superior to you, no matter their level of intelligence. If that is not a striking resemblance to women then I really don't know what is. Sure cats are cute and most of them have beautiful eyes, but cats are hard to love and even if you do love them, it just is never enough for them. A cat must have a velvet cover and anything that it has must match with its own color or taste. Cats are not known for their loyalty and even if they are loyal, they still want the upper-hand in everything to stay loyal. At a time when they were worshipped by the Egyptians and portrayed as Gods, they still wanted more. I don't know what more they wanted, it's just in their nature to want more and never be contend. But cats are understanding and no matter what their mate does, they try to understand. Contemplating all these we can understand why women are felines. If you haven't understood why women are cats, it's because of the similar traits that they share with the felines. P.S- If you haven't understood you are not very bright. N.B. Stuck in a room with cat or woman, a man or dog is bound to get hurt.

Fighting Like Cats and Dogs
Men and women carry out fights more brutal than real cats and dogs and thus when one realizes how men and women are dogs and cats; hence the expression begins to make sense. Opposites attract and therefore a man is attracted to a woman whereas EJ is an exception. Woofs and meows, the whole thing, I am sure has now began to make sense. There are exceptions to both cases because I am a puppy and my significant other is a kitten and this has been mentioned for your convenience and mine too. Not that it makes sense to you but then some things aren't supposed to and while you contemplate my pup/kitty statement I sign off with a hint of elusive mystery.

Disclaimer: - There are more exceptions than one can think of. There are men who help to accent the dirty dog and there are women who act as men's savior. Without either this world couldn't last for long. All opinions and views are mine and only mine and because they are copy-written and original don't pretend that they are yours. Elton J. is fictional, not catholic, plain fictional.

By Osama Rahman



By the Riverside

By the riverside I lay down my heart
And on the water I write your name,
The waves ripple like your sleek lustrous hair
Rain drops glitter to say you are listening.
I rest my head on the bosom of the grass
Dews like your hands cradle me
Silent stars lend their ears
For my songs that you are listening.
Here am I by the riverside,
Where my footsteps are breathing
I will hold you in my eyes,
Chant your name, till you come running.

By Adnan M. S. Fakir

What they don't teach in school…

thankfully

Recently some articles in RS showed was what we should do in case of minor injuries. But there are quite a number of things that you shouldn't do under those circumstances. So, keeping the safety of the readers in mind we have made a list of things you should absolutely avoid when someone sustains the following injuries.

When there is nose bleeding:
-Do not, I repeat do not smack the guy with a nose bleed on the back of his head as hard as you can just for the fun of it.

-Put pressure on nose for 10 minutes, but don't hold both his nose and mouth for 10 minutes.

-Do not claim to be a doctor and perform open heart surgery on the guy with a slight nose bleed. Because we all know that impersonating a doctor can lead to some dire consequences.

When a cat or dog bites you:
-Biting the animal that just bit you doesn't help, but you could try cursing or kicking it for mental satisfaction.

-The idea is not to be bitten in the first place. Which means, just to stay on the safe side, avoid the overwhelming urge to shave all house cats and castrate random street dogs.

-Sucking the wound to get the blood out is not a good idea. Because cats and dogs don't inject poison into the bloodstream like snakes and real life is not a Hindi movie.

When there is a fire burn:
-When someone is on fire, do not pour gasoline over him to put the fire out.

-Do not call the fire service to deal with a first degree burn. As cool as firemen are, I don't think they know much about health and medicine, it might be better to call a doctor.

-Do not steal a fancy car, run an old lady over with it and then crash into the RAB HQ.

When there is bleeding from a large cut:
-Do not poke the wound with a stick to see how far you can go without hitting the bones.

-Do not perform CPR on someone who is bleeding from such a cut, especially if the person belongs to the same sex.

-Do not initiate a game with your friends to see who can put the weirdest thing inside the wound.

By Sadman Alvi


Till death do us apart

Now that they are retired, my mother and father are discussing all aspects of their future. "What will you do if I die before you do?" Dad asked Mom. After some thought, she said that she'd probably look for a house sharing situation with three other single or widowed women who might be a little younger than herself, since she is so active for her age. Then Mom asked Dad, "What will you do if I die first?" He replied, "Probably the same thing."

 

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