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Issue No: 112
March 28, 2009

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Law ammusement

Outrageous Lawsuits

Oh Canada!
Mr. Waddah Mustapha, a hairstylist from Windsor, native of Lebanon but residing in Ontario at the time of the alleged tort, claimed significant psychological damages after seeing a dead fly floating in his unopened water bottle.

At no time in the litigation was the assault upon the poor little fly's person acknowledged. Indeed, it seems that he drowned anonymously. The SPCA did not intervene. For the purposes of this article, we will refer to the deaf fly as "David".

As for Mustapha:
"In the course of replacing an empty bottle of drinking water with a full one, Mr. Mustapha saw a dead fly (David) and part of another dead fly in the unopened replacement bottle. He became obsessed with the event and its 'revolting implications' for the health of his family, which had been consuming water supplied by Culligan for the previous 15 years. The plaintiff developed a major depressive disorder with associated phobia and anxiety. He sued Culligan for damages."

On this basis, the perfect storm of an outrageous lawsuit began. First, the claim tied up the Court of Justice Brockenshire who (!) awarded Mustapha over $300K in damages, clearly breaking open Canada's reputation as a safe haven for these types of claims. The decision was appealed where, in a presumably hermetically sealed Courtroom, the Ontario Court of Appeal dismissed the claim. Mustapha then took his case to Ottawa where a full bench of nine judges heard about David. On May 22, 2008, after well over $1-million in lawyer and expert fees, Court time and judge's salary spent, the ruling came down: "the loss suffered by the plaintiff, Mr. Mustapha, was too remote to be reasonably foreseen and that consequently, he cannot recover damages from the defendant" and the pesky ghost of David, then resting on the back of Canadian justice, was finally brushed off.


Let's Hope They're Kooks
Luis Sanchez has filed a claim in Hawaii's US District Court seeking to halt the construction of a particle accelerator in Geneva alleging that it would ignite a black hole and might swallow the entire earth into it. The 27km-long device, called LHC, short for Large Hadron Collider, runs across the France/Switzerland border and is set to start operations in late 2008. The claim is against the US Department of Energy and others alleging that:

"The LHC will very possibly produce 2 kinds of particles which are extremely dangerous for the safety of this planet, as they have been proven both theoretically to be able to swallow in a chain reaction the entire mass of planet Earth.

"A cosmological bomb billions of times more powerful than the A-Bomb ... might possibly be created... Black holes are, unlike normal Atomic Bombs, self-reproductive bombs; that is, substances, which actively attract and transform our normal matter and whose strength is such that once they become stable they cannot be controlled or destroyed by human beings, who are millions of times 'lighter' [less dense] than those substances. It is thus extremely dangerous to produce any quantities of Dark Matter [strange matter or black holes] of any form on Earth."

 

Source: www.duhaime.org

 
 
 
 


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