If
I had the wherewithal to start a university I would do it, and
I would call my university, North-North-West University, NNWU
for short. It sounds pretty neat. All the other main points
of the compass have already been taken. There is of course North
South University, globally known as NSU for its quality education.
And there is East West University, Eastern University and Northern
University. I am told that applications for South Asian University
and Southern University have been submitted. There are a few
more but it is difficult to keep track when the wind is southerly.
My inspiration for North-North-West University comes from Hamlet
who told his friends that he was “but mad north-north west.”
One
has to admit that there is a bit of madness going round with
private universities sprouting up in every street corner and
new ones being launched every other week. First it was shrimps,
then it was the garments industry (or maybe it is the other
way around), and now it seems that establishing a private university
is the new band-wagon that everyone is climbing onto. Almost
anybody who is somebody, or thinks he is somebody, and has a
bit of money, gets together with a group of people, also with
a bit of money, and opens a university. It's that easy. Earlier
it used to be poverty that was big business; now it is Higher
Education.
Square
inch for square inch, the two or three square miles covering
the Dhanmondi residential area/Satmasjid area, and the one square
mile in the Banani/Gulshan area, must surely have the largest
number of universities and academic institutions of various
sorts anywhere in the whole world. If Bangladesh is the second-lowest
nation (after Afghanistan), in the world in terms of tele-density
(number of telephones per citizen), we at least can claim the
distinction of being the first in uni-density (number of universities
per square mile) in the two areas mentioned. Simply, in terms
of the number of schools, colleges, institutes, coaching centers,
and universities located in the Dhanmondi/Satmasjid and Banani/Gulshan
areas, Bangladesh might very well claim a place in the Guinness
Book of World Records.
Drive
through Satmasjid Road and Dhanmondi and you will come across
DIU on your left and further down and you will see CUB (Dhaka
Branch), and if I remember right there is PUB right next to
a diagnostic centre. Look towards the left on Jigatola and you
will see the signboard of another university with the same abbreviation,
DIU, and ambitiously named, Dhaka International University.
Further up, there is SU, and on either side of the road, there
are at least a dozen universities, and sundry institutions and
centres, all with foreign-affiliations. Somewhere in Dhanmondi,
there is Eastern University, and IBAIS University, IUBIT and
Central Women's University, American International University
and People's University of Bangladesh, and University of Development
Alternatives, and on and on it goes. The originality in naming
is overwhelming. The name that stands out in my memory from
all the rest is one institution that calls itself, “Amorous
Coaching Centre,” just behind the police box on Mirpur Road.
One wonders what they do or teach.
There
is also no reason why Dhaka Government College shouldn't soon
become Dhaka University College, and Dhaka City College metamorphose
into Dhaka City College University. I remember Viqarunnesa School
became College became University, and like a conveyor belt supplying
quarter-finished products (SSC students) to its college, the
institution promised to send HSC students onto the final stage
in the university when fully-finished products with BBAs and
degrees in Information Technology were expected to tumble out
of the education factory. The University however was closed
down before this could happen. Who can guarantee that today's
Tiny Tots Tutorial will not transform into tomorrow's Tiny Tots
University? After all, today's tiny tots are tomorrow's hot
shots. The names really don't matter as long as the product
is hot.
It
is not quite proper to bite the hand that sometimes feeds you.
Hundreds of well-qualified teachers from public universities
moonlight in these institutions, supplementing their own meager
salaries; quite a few former vice-chancellors and senior professors
of different public universities now officiate as vice-chancellors
of these private universities. If I am lucky, even I might be
offered a position someday. However, it would be equally improper
not to say something but an educational phenomenon that is arguably
one of the most unique in the world. The proliferation of private
universities since the Private Universities Act of 1991 has
been staggering. About 45 private universities in a little over
10 years, and less than 15 public universities since Bangladesh
became independent! Not only is there something very wrong and
frightening about these figures, it is absolutely imperative
to do something, and do it quickly.
The
UGC, under its new Chairman, is now closely scrutinizing the
operation of the universities. This is the body that permitted
the private universities to come into existence, and this is
the body that must ensure that they function properly. A committee
has already found 18 irregularities; the size of the campus,
the tuition fees for students, the salary structure for teachers,
the number of full-time teachers, admission procedures, and
so on, are some features that have been examined.
If
higher education is now big business, the UGC has much more
of a responsibility to monitor the activities of the private
universities. This is what we expect from the new UGC Chairman,
and this is what we believe he will deliver. In the meantime
I have to get a copyright on the name of my university, North-North-West
University.
