Jokes
This
is How to Go About It!
The
Angry Genie
One day a man was walking along the beach when he tripped
over a lamp. He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger.
A few seconds later, a genie popped out of the lamp, but the
genie was angry that the man had kicked his lamp.
Reluctantly,
the genie said, "Even though you kicked me, I still have
to give you three wishes. However because of what you did,
I will also give twice what you wish for to the person you
hate the most: your boss."
So
the man agreed and made his first wish. "I want lots
of money", he said. Instantly 22 million dollars appear
in the man's bank account and 44 million appeared in his boss'
account.
For
his second wish, the man wished for a couple of sports cars.
Instantly a Lamborghini, Ferrari and a Porsche appeared, but
at the same time outside his boss' house appeared two of each
car.
Finally
the genie said, "This is your last wish, you should choose
carefully", and so the man replied... "I've always
wanted to donate a kidney..."
The Counsellor
After just a few years of marriage, filled with constant arguments,
a young man and his wife decided the only way to save their
marriage was to try counselling. They had been at each other's
throat for some time and felt that this was their last straw.
When they arrived at the counsellor's office, the counsellor
jumped right in and opened the floor for discussion.
"What
seems to be the problem?" Immediately, the husband held
his long face down without anything to say. On the other hand,
the wife began talking 90 miles an hour describing all the
wrongs within their marriage.
After
5...10...15 minutes of listening to the wife, the counsellor
went over to her, picked her up by her shoulders, kissed her
passionately for several minutes, and sat her back down. Afterwards,
the wife sat there speechless.
He looked
over at the husband who was staring in disbelief at what had
happened. The counsellor spoke to the husband, "Your
wife NEEDS that at least twice a week!"
The husband
scratched his head and replied, "I can have her here
every Tuesdays and Thursdays."
That's
Strange!
Aman named William Strange died, and his friend asked the
tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone: "Here lies
Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer."
The inscriber
insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for
passers-by would tend to think that three men were buried
under the stone. However, he suggested an alternative.
He suggested
the following: "Here Lies a Man who was BOTH honest and
a lawyer."
That way,
whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they
would be certain to remark: "That's Strange!!"
Copyright (R)
thedailystar.net 2004
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