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     Volume 4 Issue 26 | December 24, 2004 |


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Write to Mita

Dear Mita,
I am a very trusting person. This has proved to be a major problem at the marketplace where shopkeepers easily sweet-talk me into buying things that turn out to be defective. The same thing happened again recently when I went to buy a cartridge for my printer. I have started hating my own race and country. What should I do?
RAQ

Dear RAQ
Often trusting people get cheated, but that does not mean that one should start hating everyone. There are good and bad people everywhere and unfortunately you have come in contact with the bad ones. Please take some time to think about all the good things that have happened to you. Think about the number of times you have been rewarded because you decided to trust. The best way to survive in these situations is to remember the pleasant experiences and overlook the unpleasant ones.

Dear Mita,
I'm a student of BBA in a private university in Dhaka. For the past two months, I've been having problems with my father as he is almost pressurising me to take up some of his business responsibilities. But I have only begun my second year and it is difficult enough as it is dealing with my studies and my own personal life. I've become almost abnormal and am very frustrated nowadays! At times, many undesirable thoughts come to mind. Can you please give me some advice?
Outraged

Dear Outraged,
Please calm down and avoid getting so agitated. Your father thinks that if you take some responsibilities from now it will help you later to take care of the family business. You must explain to him how tough it is to study and do well in the BBA course. Try to involve him in your studies and academics-related work. Also discuss this with other family members or a friend that he particularly trusts. I am sure you will be able to solve this problem and at the same time make your father proud and happy.

Dear Mita,
My friend studies at a private university. Recently, a new teacher has joined and she has classes with him. My friend is a very open-minded, fun person. She was on good terms with the teacher from the beginning. One day he asked her about her family but she didn't suspect anything. The next day he called her and told her he loved her. My friend was astonished. She is not interested in having a relationship with a teacher and she told him just as much. But the teacher said he would wait for her and that he was qualified enough to marry her. He wanted to talk to her family. Now my friend is afraid that if she refuses him, he might fail her in the course. She is also afraid that her family might agree as the teacher is qualified. What should my friend do?
Friend

Dear Friend,
Your friend should definitely tell this teacher that she does not love him and has no intention to marry him. There is no need to be afraid of him. He cannot just fail her if he wants to. If he stoops to that then your friend has enough grounds to get him into a lot of trouble. Any teacher who will coerce a student to marry him is not good enough to be married to nor can he be a good friend. Please advise your friend not to be intimidated just because he is a teacher. I know that in certain circumstances romance blossoms between teachers and students. However, this should be highly discouraged.

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