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    Volume 9 Issue 15| April 9, 2010|


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Postscript

It's all About Perspective

Aasha Mehreen Amin

It's amazing how members of the same species can have such different takes on the same thing. That's what make us humans different from the rest of the animal kingdom according to the scientists. But even a fool knows that it also has a lot to do with what stage in life you are in. Think of this scenario: Your teenage daughter is suddenly rushing to her computer before school to take something in her pen drive. You sigh with parental adoration: Ah, the poor dear is so serious about school, she must be taking the assignment she forgot. Reality: The poor dear is saving a few songs on her pen drive because she has only two songs in her cell phone and how can she possibly survive the bus ride on just that? You fume in silence and then don't know what to say when later, at the end of a school day just when you have finished rehearsing your lecture on 'priorities' she comes home and excitedly tells you that she passed her test because of a song? Apparently when she was asked what an 'equinox' was she managed to reply 'when the sun is perched at its highest peak in the middle of the day' which is approximately the right answer and which, by the way, she happens to know because it was in the lyrics of a song!

Even more fascinating is how similarly certain groups of people think no matter where they are from.

Mothers for instance, all over the globe, keep trying to feed their children when they don't want to be fed or complaining that their child is fat after contributing significantly to their offspring's obesity. Arekta nugget khaona baba (Have another nugget honey).

Fathers universally have a pathological hatred for any male that shows an interest in their daughters because "all men are b....... and have only one thing on their mind."

Mothers-in-law, no matter which part of the planet they are in truly believe that their sons were angels until their wives turned them into selfish, henpecked husbands who have no feeling for their mothers because of who else- their daughters-in-law who have no idea how to take care of their sons, how to cook, how to raise children...

Politicians all over the planet have the same strategy: make lofty promises in their manifestoes and then make sure they break each and every one during their time of power. We will bring peace to the nation, rice in every belly, electricity in every wire and gas in every stove. Then the public becomes catatonic with shock when they sit in the eternal darkness or fluctuating power, when rice becomes a luxury item and it's back to collecting twigs and branches to cook.

Single men everywhere, will go to any lengths to get the girl who plays hard to get, they will stand in the rain for hours outside her home or write love letters with their own (sometime's chickens are involved) blood. Then, once Dreamgirl has been swept off her feet and is swooning with love and adoration the ardent lover gets re-hooked with televised sports and eternal adda with the guys. After all, wooing is high maintenance, not to mention exhausting both physically and financially so there has to be a more manageable state in the romance.

Single women in every nook and cranny of this earth have one major obsession: to be in love and be loved. Sometimes the object of their misplaced affections can be the vilest of creatures who have mastered the art of deception and cruelty, sometimes even disgusting habits too, but to their female significant others, they are just 'lost souls who need a little TLC (Tender Loving Care) for them to become the saints that they are.

Doctors, no matter where they are practising, are the same. They have amazing brains and brilliant reading skills but they have the worst handwriting; only experienced drug store salesmen can decipher the hieroglyphics.

Even babies and toddlers all over the world have a common code: Get those slaves (parents and grandparents mainly) to comply with every single demand such as asking the grandmother to play dead for an hour or two and screaming at the top of their lungs if they are refused.

The list of similar human behaviour is endless and it is a wonder that we still manage to uphold the myth of individuality and diversity. Yes the packaging maybe different and even the branding, but inside, the contents of different categories of human, are basically the same. Just take teenagers all over the globe. Have you met a single one who doesn't have mood swings?

 


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