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    Volume 9 Issue 20| May 14, 2010|

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Write to Mita

Dear Mita,
I have been teaching this girl who is an O'Levels student for many years. Initially, I didn't have any feelings for her but as she grew older, her intelligence, passion, wit and vivacity caught my attention and I fell deeply in love with her. I think she may have feelings for me too because when she had started her O'levels course, she took science related subjects which I could not teach her because I majored in arts, but she insisted I continue to be her tutor and sit with her while she studied and produced excellent results for her exams. I don't want to hurt or offend her or her family in any way but I can think of nothing else and it is affecting my work and my relationship with my family. Please tell me what I should do.

Dear Infatuated,
I honestly think it is inappropriate to have such feelings for a student moreover a student of O' levels is too young to think of serious feels and relationships. However, if there is not too much age difference between you two then try to find her feelings for you. The fact that she wants you as a teacher is no guarantee that she is in love with you. It seems she is a brilliant student and my advise is to let her be and allow her to grow and develop her potentials as a person.

Dear Mita,
I am a twenty-year-old university student who has been involved with a girl for two years. Last year, I had to move to Khulna because my father got transferred there from work. I kept in touch with my girlfriend and we talked and emailed regularly. However, recently she confessed to me that she had been intimate with another man and that she regretted it and still loved me. I am very confused as to whether I should forgive her and try to trust her again.

Dear Disappointed,
You have every right to be hurt and disappointed. She has broken your trust and it will be hard for you to forgive her. However, these things do happen in this day and age. It all depends on the strength of your relationship. For some this might be too much to swallow and it is then best to break it off. On the other hand you both might discuss and decide that you mean a lot to each other and you will be able to whether the storm.

Dear Mita
I have a close friend who is a year older than I am. I have fallen deeply in love with her, but when I confessed my feelings to her, she said she loves me but her family would never accept a younger man for her. The problem is, I'm not sure if my family will accept either but I still want to give it a shot. Please tell me how I can convince her to give me a chance.

Dear Confused,
Relationship with a girl who is a year older than you should not be a big issue. Normally parents want their daughters to marry someone who is settled. However, if you are in love and serious then you should be able to convince your families. Nowadays parents do not interfere so much with their children. On the other had you will have to prove that you are matured enough to take the responsibility of a serious relationship which will result in marriage someday.

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