Home   |  Issues  |  The Daily Star Home | Thursday, May 11, 2006




Scary Movie 4

Review by Gokhra

Scary Movie could just as easily have been called Silly Movie because that is exactly what it is. So those of you looking for serious thought provoking movies that provide answers to all worldly problems, then flip to the next page and look for something else.

This is not a movie that will get rave reviews from critically acclaimed critics (thank goodness I am not one). They are too stuck up to laugh. For them gay cowboy stories are big hits. Anybody other than aatels will have a lot of fun with this movie. At the end of the day that's what it is all about.

It's very much like the first three installments of the insanely successful franchise. It makes fun of a lot of current movies whether they're scary or not making it a hit for movie buffs. And then you have our usual liberal doses of gross bodily noises and fluids.

The movie starts off with celebrity figures Dr. Phil and Shaquille O'Neal. Who's Phil you ask? Well he's this Oprah type prime time famous bald guy who solves peoples problems.

The plot:
The show starts with a spoof of "Saw," in which both are chained to a device connected to a basketball net, and all Shaq has to do is make a free throw to unleash them. And here, the ball is literally a rock.

Then comes a parody of the Japanese horror remake "The Grudge”. Regular Scary Movie star Anna Faris takes on the role of Sarah Michelle Gellar. The male counterpart is played by Craig Bierko filling in for Tom Cruise including all the famous jumping on Oprahs couch act.

Cindy has left her job as journalist and her son Cody is now at a military academy. She has moved into a haunted house (Grudge) caring for a catatonic old lady. Next door lives Tom Ryan. And here "War of the Worlds" is ridiculed big time while Tom Ryan tries desperately to bond with kids who hate him while aliens smash New York.

And of course how could gay cowboy movies not be spoofed? Yep, "Brokeback Mountain" is poked at with a couple of black guys. Then there's the luscious Carmen Electra playing the blind young woman in "The Village." Sadly the acts she is put in are a bit disappointing. Other corny corky parodies include "King Kong", “Million Dollar Baby” and "Hustle and Flow."

The verdict: It's got a lot of laughs. If you've sent the movies that are being spoofed you will notice that Scary Movie goes to great lengths to copy the details perfectly, right down to the costumes and camera angles. It's hilarious though at times some of the gags can go on for a bit too long.

The Scary Movie franchise has been the staple of spoofs and potty humor for a long time now. The movies knows the audience and man, the audience can be gross. Surprisingly it is also the least obscene movie of the entire series though that doesn't make it very safe either. It's a lot of fun despite having way too many corny jokes. It starts off brilliantly but then starts to unravel a bit. It also has a great ending but overall it's not that much of a hilarious movie although aching sides are a possibility. What's missing are the crazy antics of the Wayans Brothers who created the frst two hits.

Michelle Monaghan was born on March 23, 1977 in the rural farming community of Winthrop, Iowa to Sharon and Bob Monaghan. She had two brothers named John and Bob Jr.

She was very motivated as a young woman and had her mind set on becoming a journalist. Because of her drive, determination and respect of her fellow classmates, she was elected as the president of her High School class.

After graduating High School, she went to Chicago to fulfill her journalistic desire and study journalism. Between studying, she did some modeling to make a few extra bucks. To her delight it more than paid for tuition and eventually became to the conclusion that she would rather pursue a career in modeling instead of journalism.

She eventually became interested in acting and eventually received a few minor parts in episodes of a few television series such as Young Americans (in which she appeared twice) in 2000 and Law & Order: Special Victims Unit in 2001.

This eventually lead to the big screen and she made her big screen debut in 2001 with the small role of Henrietta in the movie Perfume. This was followed up by another small role in Unfaithful in 2002.

In the mean time she continued her modeling career and eventually expanded her resume by doing commercials. She has appeared in some television commercials for products such as Stayfree deodorant in 2001 and Secret Sheer dry in 2002.

Her big break came in 2002, when she co-starred on the television series Boston Public in the role of Kimberly Woods. After the two year run on the television series, she turned back to the silver screen and appeared in It Runs in the Family in 2003, Winter Solstice in 2004 and. Her roles kept on getting better and she appeared in the blockbuster The Bourne Supremacy also in 2004 and then Mr. and Mrs. Smith in 2005.

In 2005 she starred in her first movie, a comedy/murder spoof entitled Kiss Kiss Bang Bang along side Val Kilmer and Robert Downey Jr.

And now she has had her biggest role so far opposite Cruise as a butt kicking damsel in MI3. What will this talented actress do next?

Excerpt from one of her post MI3 interviews:
Monaghan was shocked when she was asked if she'd like to be involved in the movie. She had good reason though the only thing J.J. Abrams (director) had seen her in was her audition tape for the film Constantine a film she was ultimately cut out of!

“He saw my audition tape, and called up out of the blue and asked to have a meeting. He wanted me to audition with Tom!”, says the animated young actress, who first gained attention in last year's action-comedy Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang.

“So, I met Tom on the set of War of the Worlds, so not only was I meeting Tom, I was meeting Steven Spielberg! I just thought 'What am I doing here?' A year ago, this Easter Sunday, I was told I got the job. I started crying. J.J was like 'What? Is there a scheduling conflict?' I was like 'No, I just got the job'. He was like 'Don't cry about it, my god!'”

And was Tom Cruise exactly how she'd imagined he'd be?
“I already had my own perception of what Tom was going to be like. I thought he probably won't talk to me that much, and he'll probably spend all his time in his trailer. I couldn't have been more wrong. I almost wanted to call him another name like Harry, for instance [laughs] because it's as if there's Tom Cruise, the entity, and then this other guy. 'But you're not Tom Cruise, Tom Cruise is this' I'd tell him.”

Monaghan is currently going straight into another project. She'll play a lead role in Ben Affleck's directorial debut Gone, Baby, Gone, based on the book by Dennis Lehane.

“It's going to be set in Boston and it'll star Casey Affleck and Ed Harris. I play a private investigator….kinda like a low-rate private investigator and something really serious happens in South Boston.”

Big Bad Bikes

Compiled by Mood Dude

Our pages have brought you the biggest, baddest things on wheels. You previously saw the Triumph that had an engine that would shame most cars in our country. But there are other big bad contenders and now presenting the Honda Valkyrie Rune. It's a bit of a dream and definitely an icon.

The Valkyrie Rune incorporates a unique diamond-shaped aluminum frame for robust strength along with light weight, plus a fuel-injected 1832cc engine based on the GL1800 power plant.

Meanwhile, styling element after styling element tears at your eyeballs, vying for attention. The chromed cylinder head covers evocative muscle car hardware. The gorgeous, smoothly flowing six-into-two exhaust system so artfully sculpted into place. The brawny disc brakes, which are the largest ever mounted on a Honda motorcycle. Then there is the gracefully flowing lines of the neo/retro low-slung bodywork with the solo seat that beckons you to slide aboard for the ride of your life redefining the ultimate performance custom.
The price of $27,000 (with chromed wheels) is not so shocking after consider the degree of detail and the quality of finish. It's amazing that a huge company like Honda ever took the Rune past the concept-vehicle stage, that it took the time (6 years) and effort to build a limited-production piece of rolling art.

After all, it's not rare for an artist to draw a pulse-accelerating design for a vehicle. And there is a small legion of custom builders who can take that vision and hammer it into rolling reality with varying degrees of success. But if you tell that builder that you want that machine to be comfortable, handle well, and be as dependable and consistent as a production bike, he'll probably have to resort to insulting your manhood, because... well, it ain't going to happen.

You literally drop into the saddle as it is way down there and the front end seems to be way out ahead of you. But some of that is an illusion because the trailing-link fork's legs are out ahead of the front axle. The headlight, which stretches way forward, amplifies the impression.

The Rune is apparently very rideable. Blipping the throttle gets smooth, quick response and a potent six-cylinder growl. The clutch pulls in easily, and a light, short stroke of the toe snicks the gearbox quietly into first. Power is right there. You don't need much more than idle to feed the clutch out and pull away positively. The power from the massive 1832cc Gold Wing engine just flows from idle.

One magazine tester (lucky *%&#@$%) ran it down to 17 mph in top gear and snapped the throttle open. The engine just surged without any pinging. That, folks, is torque.

But your first time out on the Rune, you probably won't be thinking as much about the engine as about manhandling the mass of that hulking machine beneath you. Yeah, you can tell it's a super-sized cruiser at very low speeds, especially if you are making a tight turn, such as hanging a U on a narrow road.

Steering is light and precise, and you can make direction changes with impressive speed. Snap a lane change or swerve around an errant chunk of tire tumbling down the highway, and the Valkyrie Rune responds like a much smaller bike yet feels completely settled while doing it.

For many buyers and envious admirers, the primary appeal of the Rune will lie in its appearance. You have to look pretty hard to find anything that falls short of the standards of finish that you'd expect to find on a $35,000 custom motorcycle, and many pieces that fit, work or mesh with the rest of the bike better than any custom. This is a bike designed to make everyone envy its owners.



home | Issues | The Daily Star Home

© 2006 The Daily Star