Spy Moms: Game Over
Mission: Coaching Centers

By Mama's bandor chele

They aren't the CIA or FBI. They do not work for NSA or Mussaud. They are the secret agents of MIA (Mom Intelligence Agency).They are the ones who made the beds, cooked the meals, cleaned the house, baked the cookies, tended the garden, canned the vegetables, squeezed the clothes, hung washed clothes to dry on lines strung through the veranda, ironed everything, scrubbed the floors, and walked seven blocks to buy groceries. Even after doing so much work, they don't forget to keep an sharp eye on us (the kids). They are always inevitable. When I use to request my mom, not to accompany me to the coaching centre, she would always give me her “I-only-do-it-because-I-love-you” lecture.

With coaching centres growing like mushrooms in every alley of the city and with all the rumours about it, MIA maybe felt the necessity of extending their sight and network by placing their agents even in the coaching centres beside their homes. One can walk into these coaching centres and find out a bunch of moms sitting together at one corner of the room, their eyes darting from one corner of the room to another. But don't they get bored ? I don't think so.

“Oh my God! Why will I get bored? Do you have any idea about the boys in the coaching centres? They are just awful. They keep on staring at my daughter until and unless I ball my eyes back at them. This is a matter of security. Do you understand?” This is what one of the moms, in one of the coaching centre, yelled at me.

For boys, be very circumspect in choosing thy company, because each and every friend of yours is analysed by a group of moms. Not just boys or girls. There are some warning notes for the teachers too.

“Bhabi last day I found out that this maths teacher is so miserable. He keeps on this faltu bogbog all throughout the class. You know, that is why my son is failing in school.

The other bhabis then asked “How do you know this, bhabi?”

“Umm… I peeped through the window few times”
This is what I heard, when I went to meet my poor old maths teacher.

Now is it all about spying? The answer is “No”. Digging down deeper, some interesting things are found. Like the students, coaching centres have become a place for moms to meet their friends (the other moms).After having a hard time in their houses these coaching centres allows our moms to relax for a certain time. How, you ask?

“We all gather here by evening. Start talking about our families. Share some moments of happiness or sadness. Talk about the problems we face. So that someone can come up with good solutions. We try to learn from our mistakes. And gossiping really helps to sort out the faults. Sometimes we talk about political issues, foods, upcoming fashion. Even we go out for shopping. At the end of the day, it's like a big relief to us.” said several moms, when I participated in their round table conference.

The darker the cherry, the sweeter the juice. Experience really matters a lot. After passing such a long time in many coaching centres, they came to experience several problems.

“Some coaching centres do not have any separate room or sitting arrangements for the parents. At times we have to spend two to three hours in these coaching centres. It's not that easy to go back to our home and come again. Then it becomes impossible to economise. Some of us live far away. Everyone can't afford a car. Also in some places they can't even provide us a glass of pure drinking water. They don't have fans or place for praying. You know the management doesn't even feel sorry. Instead they throw vexing remarks towards us.” reported several moms.

Spying, complaints after complaints. I think it's getting bitter. Okay then, let me introduce you my last-but-not-the-least mom, whom

I refer to as “Cool Mom”. I found her in one of the coaching centres situated in Lalmatia. To grab her attention I had to make few gestures, as she was busy listening to the song “Tere Bin…..” which she copied onto her cool MP3 player (which I really envy) few days back. After exchanging few words with her, I came to know that this MP3 player actually belongs to her daughter.

“I took it away from her to make sure she completely concentrates in her studies. In fact I love listening to Hindi songs a lot. These coaching centres do not have a television. So I thought of carrying the MP3 player with me. This is what they call ek dhile dui pakhi mara.” What a (waste of) talent.

After spending much of the day in the coaching centres, they actually have a lot of fun. Checking out every move of their kids and teachers while entertaining themselves too. I guess life is not that pathetic, mummy.