Weird News Almost Weekly

What is going on in the world, you wonder? Financial meltdowns, elections and box-office flops generally. But WAIT! Our journey entangles us in paths and corners which attracts only the strange. So, you know our news comes with an edge. Now, next time someone questions you what's going on in the world peek our info and impart this wisdom. No more yawns, almost guaranteed.

The Kawaski Parade, almost near Tokyo

1. Happy 5,300 Birthday- The hunt for Otzi's parents, relatives or even mere coffee shop acquaintances have failed. It seems Otzi is not very memorable and he is the most unrelated man in the world. Of course, given that he is a 5,300 year old mummy, the lack of blood-related homo sapiens isn't all that surprising. But that didn't deter researchers at Leeds University who have tried in vain to trace Otzi's present family. Apparently, there's this genetic lineage thing and these genetics keep changing, some variant do die out. Thus the ice-man's lineage couldn't be pin-pointed, as his line ceases to exist. Upon questioning Otzi on whether he was disappointed, we were greeted with deathly silence. Now, that he has been dead for over 5000 years, his reason to not answer is pretty acceptable. Oh and he is called Otzi? So many scientists working together and you came up with that?

2. Geek Love- Ema is 15 inches and she will kiss you on your very command. She will love you and interact with you, by kissing and kissing. No arguments, no dirty looks, no wisecracks and no demands. Nope, she will kiss you when you wish to be kissed. This 15 inches female, is actually a robot and EMA means Eternal Maiden Actualization. Produced by Sega, EMA isn't like normal females, as she kisses without having to be pleased by gifts and good deeds. Costing $175, they are a bargain, as they don't need to be given perfumes, flowers, candy, rings and stuff. Of course geeks are happy, because now they can finally be kissed. EMA can also walk and dance. The only problem is they are programmed to kiss any incoming human's face. You win some, you lose some, right?

3. Fat Fear- Mayra Rosales is 1000 pounds. If that doesn't scare you, hear this. She is charged with capital murder. Still not scared? Well here's the real deal. SHE IS STILL AT HER HOME AND NOT IN JAIL. Why, you ask? That's because though Mayra is almost convicted and is charged of murder and deserves to be in jail, the judge Hildago county allowed her home detention. This is because Mayra Rosales is much too large and is in no condition to undertake flight risk. The plane may crash. She will live. Mayra now lives at home, on state supplies of 'Slim Fast' and low diet meals. Hmm, maybe this is a much worse punishment for her.

4. Kidnapped or Not- So this mother goes about and kidnaps her own son and charges her husband 10 Lacs. Her husband lives in Kuwait and his wife tells him about how their son has been kidnapped by lord knows who and will be killed if the 10 lac isn't paid. This happens in Bangladesh by the way. So RAB is informed and the mother seems too eager to pay the ransom. They smell a rat and trace the mother. She gets caught with the 'kidnappers' who are actually her lover and lover's friend. So, why did she need money? Because she wanted to marry her lover in style and didn't have the cash to flash. Let's now observe a moment of silence and almost think up a Yo Mama joke.

They say a picture is a thousand word, so here's a weird picture of some weird people celebrating Halloween in a weird way, and this caps off this weeks weird news.

By Osama Rahman

RS Mailbox

Send us the love, hate, advice, rants and money to risingstars@thedailystar.net. We especially like the money.

Moo
The article titled 'Dying to Live' (23 October, 08) hit a nerve. Just what are we putting into our bodies? Formalin in milk, melamine in milk, water in milk. Is there any milk left in milk? Thanks for the detailed research and the very informative links. I was saving up to buy a motorbike. Now I think I will buy a cow instead. It will give me milk and a ride to work.
Wasiul Khan
Uttara

Death by pumpkin
I tried the whole pumpkin carving thing like in last weeks RS. It looked good on paper but not so much in reality. Then my mom found out I destroyed a pumpkin. She nearly carved me up. RS would have lost a fan.
Sameer
Dhanmondi

We forgot to mention 'Don't try this at home
~ Editor

Boo
The spooky issue was one of the best ever. I love ghosts. I haven't seen any but I love ghosts as long as they are cute and funny like Caspar. But why is there no mention of the ghosts we like? What happened to Slimer from Ghostbusters?
Faria Chowdhury

Shoo
Naveed C's article on ghost hunting covered the grand high tech scams of the west. But what about our very local low tech pir-fakir's incantations and singing methods? And then there is the beating-with-a-broom technique of exorcism. Brute force all the way!
Muniz Shah

Most societies from a primitive age believed spirits could take over a body. And the only way to get rid of them was apparently through a thorough beating. Of course, it was usually the spirit of the original person that would end up leaving the body for good. ~ Editor

Picture please
Understandably it was a basketball tournament by Sunnydale. And they won. And we have Sunbeam players smiling for the picture. Um, shouldn't the winners also be seen?
Hasan
Ex-Sunnydale