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to Mita
Dear
Mita,
I am an Honours student at a college in Chittagong. I recently
became friends with a girl via SMS. But she's in Dhaka and
the distance between us is frustrating. I'm in a dilemma as
to whether I should go on with this relationship or not. Please
tell me what I can do.
M
Dear
M,
The distance between you should not be a problem if you are
just friends. If you have something more serious in mind then
you should think about this because distance does create some
problems. Actually, it all depends on how far you want to
take this relationship.
Dear
Mita,
I am a third year student of a public engineering university.
I was in love with a neighbour who got married a few months
ago. Before getting married, she requested me to marry her.
However, being a student, I couldn't take such a decision
at that point. Now she is saying that she didn't understand
it before but that she can't live without me and that she
wants to divorce her husband. What can I do for her in this
situation?
MSI
Dear
MSI,
There is nothing you can do as you are still a student. It
is not fair of her to burden you with such matters. She chose
to get married and did not wait for you to complete your education.
If she is not happy with her husband then she has to think
of other options and not link you to this. Do not get involved
in all this as it might lead to complications that you are
not in a position to deal with.
Dear
Mita,
I am 21 years old. I fell in love with my best friend. Last
year, our long friendship transformed into a romantic relationship
with an unspoken promise of mutual trust. We had an extremely
close and enjoyable relationship. My love was so obvious that
I hardly worried about expressing it. Suddenly my boyfriend
got depressed and started to suspect me. He decided not to
continue a relationship where there was not enough trust.
But he is the only person I love and trust a lot. I have been
very dependent on him. I feel helpless. Neither is he in any
better condition. I spent the last four months simply doing
nothing. I have always considered myself strong, confident
and realistic. But now I am really miserable. How can I help
him to overcome his depression and return to his usual self?
How can I know what went so wrong that he can't believe anything
I say? Can counsellors really help?
Lost
Dear
Lost,
Yes, I do believe that counselling helps and you should seek
it if possible. It is difficult to understand why both of
you have lost trust but if you are so serious about each other
then you must be proactive in finding out the reasons. Being
miserable will not help. You have to get hold of your emotions
and find solutions. However, first you have to identify the
problems. Talk to his friends, cousins, etc. Most importantly,
keep communication channels open at all times. Perhaps, with
your support, he will return to his usual self.
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