Write to Mita

Write to Mita

Dear Mita,
I have a problem. I tend to gossip a lot. I have at one time or the other gossiped about all my friends behind their backs. Recently, some of the things I have said came up in conversation and my friends discovered what I had been doing and they all stopped talking to me. Despite this, I can't stop myself, I still gossip because I like it. It gets me attention and makes people interested in talking to me. I really want to get out of this habit though and I need your help to do it.
Gossip

Dear Gossip,
You can only get out of it if you really want to. This is a bad habit, can hurt people, create misunderstandings among friends and family members and most importantly has the potential to leave you friendless as some point. Every gossip tends to come back, it goes around in circles and the person you gossip about will eventually find out. If you are talking about some people behind their back, remember someone is also talking about you. Don't do it consciously, shun it whenever the opportunity comes, distract your self in other ways, read a book, watch a movie, cook something but don't gossip. You can attract much more attention by doing something nice like excelling in your studies or profession.

Dear Mita,
I have been very unhappy with my life lately. Everyone seems to be upset with me. My parents, my boyfriend and my best friends. Nothing seems to be going right for me. I am dissatisfied with what I have achieved so far, academically as well as professionally. I wasted a lot of time trying to figure out what I want from life and now it's too late to start over. I have lost interest in everything. Please tell me what I can do to make things better.
Unhappy

Dear Unhappy,
There is a saying “It is never too late” no matter how long, how old and how many times, it is never too late. Please start all over again, life is long and there is always light at the end of the tunnel. If people are upset with you then think what might be the reason. Please analyse how you have been behaving with them and instead of indulging in self pity, do something about it. Don't live in the past, put it behind and move forward. Count your blessings and be grateful for all the things you have.

Dear Mita,
I am a 28 year-old-man in love with a 17 year-old-girl. I know it sounds bad, but she is very mature for her age. More mature than I am. She is friends with my youngest sister and we met a year ago at her birthday party. It was love at first sight. She is the most beautiful woman I have ever met. I have never cared for anyone more. Unfortunately, she has no idea how I feel about her. I have only admired her from afar and never had the courage to tell her how I feel. I am worried she might think I am too old for her. But I must tell her and ask her to marry me. Can you tell me how I can find out how she feels about me before I do that? What is the best way to tell her how I feel? Please help me.
Lover

Dear Lover,
Unfortunately I cannot help you because it is true that you are too old for her. She is not yet a woman, just a teenage girl, entitled to a carefree life, entitled to get an education and a profession and not to get married at this stage in her life. I sincerely request you to get this out of your head and look for someone closer to your age.