<%-- Page Title--%> Write to Mita <%-- End Page Title--%>

<%-- Volume Number --%> Vol 1 Num 134 <%-- End Volume Number --%>

December 19, 2003

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Dear Mita,
I'm a 1st Year English Honours student. I want to be able to adjust with everyone around me, but I can't quite seem to do it. My classmates think I'm conceited and don't like me. What should I do?

Dear T,
I am sure that you are not conceited at all. You might be shy and perhaps not very comfortable soicialising with others. There are many ways to get over this problem. Try to befriend one person that you have something in common with. Take his/her help to identify the problems you are facing in terms of adjusting. There might be some very simple solutions. Secondly keep an open mind about other people, do not judge them too easily and think positively.

Dear Mita,
I'm a 2nd Year Political Science student at DU. In my first year here, I fell in love with a beautiful girl. But when I was about to tell her about my feelings, I found out she is Hindu. I'm Muslim. What if I propose to her but she turns me down because of our religious difference? What should I do?

Dear Sufferer,
Before you propose you should get to know her better. She might say no to you for others reasons also. Find out if she is at all interested in getting into a serious relationship with you. Religion is a serious factor and is sometimes too much of an obstacle to overcome. You must be prepared for all the consequences before you commit yourself to this relationship.

Dear Mita,
I'm a 19-year-old college student. I'm very interested in the Hebrew language and in Jews and their culture. Though they are generally not very popular among most, no one can deny their genius either. The Israel-Palestine conflict, the Jewish control over world business is very important, and because I also want to do business with them, it is important for me to know the language. But I live in Khulna and don't know where I can go to learn. Whenever I ask anyone they think I'm joking. Please help.
--A man in darkness

Dear darkness,
I am sorry but I am unable to help you. You might thinking of looking up the web site and get some information.

Dear Mita,
I'm a 23-year-old, 4th Year medical student. A girl from 1st Year fell in love with me at first sight some time ago. I have faced this situation many times before and blew it off as an infatuation, but I was wrong. She loves me very much but I don't. I have tried to make her understand this and that I will marry whoever my family chooses for me, but I have failed. What should I do?
--Confused, S

Dear Confused,
If you are so sure then you must communicate this to her. You must make her understand that this will lead to nothing and will cause her pain. If she just refuses to understand then there is nothing you can do. Just make sure that people around you know that you have sincerely tried.

Dear Mita,
I'm a 19-year-old HSC candidate. In my first year, I fell in love with one of my classmates. She was very beautiful and we were madly in love. I couldn't live without her. But some time ago, her family made her marry someone else. It didn't last, and she got a divorce within two months. I want to marry her, but my parents won't accept her, and if I marry her against their wishes, they will disown me too. I have to choose between my family and my love. To make things worse, her family is trying to marry her off again. I don't know what to do. Please help.

Dear H.
Your letter has confused me. You say you are only 19 and your girl friend has been married once and is about to be married again? Well, at 19 you are hardly in a position to get married your self. If you both are so sure about your love then you should wait till you are ready to take this responsibility. She will have to somehow convince her parents and resist getting married for the second time. I have said this many times before, parents cannot force an adult person to get married. It needs a lot of courage to stand up against ones parents. However, if her love is true then she will overcome any obstacles and come to you at the right time.


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