Dear
Mita,
I am 20 years old and a first year student of Geography
at DU. Recently I am facing a serious problem. One of my
cousins has confessed his love for me. Because he is younger
than me, I rejected his proposal without delay. The problem
is that now he cannot think about anything but me. He writes
to me all the time, but I do not write back. Under these
circumstances my normal life and studies are being hampered
because I cannot reach a decision. How can I get out of
this position?
Problem
Dear
Problem,
You have rejected his proposal for valid reasons and should
stick to it. He needs to grow up and understand that he
cannot change your mind just by being persistent. Getting
involved with cousins is not a good idea in the first place,
moreover he seems like an immature person and will not be
the right person for you. You might want to talk with him
seriously and explain gently but firmly that this will not
work. You should not allow this to hamper your studies because
you have already made a decision. What you need to do now
is stick to it.
Dear
Mita,
I am a twenty-two year old Honours student. One day I saw
a young beautiful girl and I fell in love with her. After
thirteen days I approached her and asked her to hear me
out. She agreed. She had already guessed what I was going
to say. When I professed my love for her she did not refuse
my offer. She told me that she likes me very much and may
even love me. However, while we were talking her older sister
began walking towards us and so she had to leave quickly.
We did not have time to exchange phone numbers or addresses.
Many days have passed now and although she does not know
anything about me, and me about her, I think she would agree
to meet me and write to me. How can i find her again?
Lost Love
Dear
Lost,
Meeting a beautiful girl for a few minutes is hardly a basis
for any serious involvement . Moreover, if she is really
interested then she will try to find you somehow. I should,
however caution you that this might lead to nothing and
you should not spend too much time and energy behind this.
You are 22 and should start to think of more matured and
lasting relationships. Falling in love requires more than
a fleeting look or a short conversation on the wayside.
Dear
Mita,
I'm doing my MBA in a public university.
For the last seven years I have never had any love interest.
Recently however, I met a girl who changed all of that.
Now I find that I cannot stop thinking about this girl and
cannot even speak to her. I think she knows that I feel
this way, and I know that if I proposed my love to her she
would agree. The problem is that she is a non-Muslim. I
am the only son of my mother, (my father died 12 years ago)
and so my mother's contribution in my life is more than
usual. She has dreams that she wants me to pursue. I know
that if I marry a non-Muslim, it will completely break her
heart. I believe that if i go through with this my mother
with inadvertently curse the relationship because I disobeyed
her. However I cannot forget this girl. What can I do?
Torn
Dear
Torn,
Relationships between people of different religions is always
difficult and needs a lot of commitment from both sides.
From what you say it seems that you have not even approached
her. It is too early to decide whether you want to make
her you life partner.
Regarding you mother, she obviously has dreams and is pinning
a lot of hope on you to fulfill those. Under these circumstances,
whatever step you take will have very serious consequences
on you relationship with her. Please approach this very
carefully. Think through every action and the implication
this might have on your future. Eventually if you do decide
to go ahead then you will just have to convince your mother
and the rest of the world that this is the most appropriate
girl for you.
|