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Dear
Mita,
I am a second year Honours student of a renowned college.
For about two years, I've been in love with a man from a less
renowned college. I love him very much, especially because
he works very hard in order to have a successful career. But
I am the only daughter of my parents. They get many marriage
proposals for me where most of the men live abroad and are
highly qualified and so my parents have big dreams for me.
I told my love that he has to do very well that I would be
able to marry him. But I don't want to dishonour my parents
in society. What if my love fails to achieve success? Should
I do as my parents say? Please help me; I'm very tense.
Tensed
Dear
Tensed,
As they say, "love conquers all". If you are really
in love then you should be patient and give him a chance to
prove himself. Your parents might have dreams for you and
that includes your happiness. Although a certain amount of
wealth is required, it is not the only criteria for a happy
marriage. If both of you work hard to follow your dreams with
determination then you will succeed in convincing your parents.
They of course want what is best for you and will only be
convinced if you prove that the man you have chosen is the
best for you.
Dear
Mita,
I am 27 years old and studying English at MC College. Unfortunately,
I had to stop studying at the secondary level but, 10 years
later, I did my SSC and HSC at Bangladesh Open University.
I could've gotten into a pass course last year but I wanted
an Honours degree in English literature so I lost another
year and am now in my first year. My problem is that my older
brother is always discouraging me about my studies because
by the time I graduate, I will be over 32 and will not qualify
for a government job. I cannot make him understand that I
can work at a grocery shop my whole life, that is not what's
important, but I really want to study. How can I make him
understand?
Hopeless
Dear
Hopeless,
The best way to deal with this is to get excellent grades.
This will convince your family that you really want to do
this. You have to explain to your brother that it does not
matter that you will be too old for a government position
since you are not interested in doing that anyway. However,
you must at the same time have a career plan and then work
towards it. This is the only way to make your brother understand.
Dear
Mita,
One of my friends loves a girl who is also my friend. But
the girl doesn't love him, or so it seems, and so we (his
friends), along with his parents, have tried to make him understand
this. But it didn't work and my friend is going astray and
taking drugs. Recently, the girl has been talking to another
guy on the phone and trying to have a relationship with him
and this has also hurt my friend a lot. He has fallen into
a depression and we are unable to help him. What can we, and
especially I, as his best friend, do to help?
S
Dear
S,
As a friend, you have to try and help your friend. However,
he must take responsibility for his actions. Getting jilted
in love is a part of growing up. Your friend has to learn
that one cannot get everything that one wants. If the girl
is no longer interested then he will have to accept it and
get along with his life. Please counsel him as much as you
can, talk to his family and other friends. But remember, he
has to help himself first.
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